So. February 14 Again.

.:Single Awareness Day!:.

My opinion of the day hasn't changed much, if at all. A promise of someone "making up" apparently was a promise ill-made, and I ended up spending most of the day in the loving arms of a good steak from Tender Bob's.

Served to me by a guy ALSO named Bob...

So I guess there's that, at least? Never been a fan of the occasion, and let's face it: the world would be a far, far better place without it, so nah, don't bother asking me how mine is turning out. Could be better, but could have also been worse, so I guess let me just relish the steak, maybe?

And here I thought I'd have you in my ear the whole day...

Project 52 (7/52): On Why I Hate February 14 (Even When I Wasn't Single)

.:Project 52 (7/52): On Why I Hate February 14 (Even When I Wasn't Single):.

The crass commercialism present during February 14 has always been mercilessly pummeled by cynical people, but really, there's nothing surprising about that at all. Ultimately, it is what it is, and it's an excuse for people to really lay on the romance thick for a day.

Which is fine, if it weren't for the fact that February 14 is just utterly ruthless to your average loveless person, and with that in mind, I couldn't help but feel guilty about the day, even during the points where I actually had someone to spend February 14 with. It just seemed like a particularly painful thing to go through, and I took no happiness in seeing the misery around me. It certainly did its job of dampening my own spirits along the way.

Of course, by now, anyone who's known me well enough knows that February 14 in 2010 was flat-out one of the worst days of my life, when somebody just decided to stick the knife into me on the one day I asked her to be kind to me. It certainly didn't do the day any favors with me, because if I hated it then, I utterly loathe it now.

I find that kind of interesting a juxtaposition, when you consider that I'm actually one of the most hopeless romantics out there. In reality, it only goes to show that there must have been a point where February 14 was actually a special, important day in my life, and my embittered position against it only underscores that for me, since others who don't feel much for the day would probably prefer to be merely ambivalent about it.

So yeah, I do hate this day. I hate it because it's crass and exploitative. I hate it because it's insensitive to people who aren't with anyone. And I hate it because it was the day my heart was broken like never before. Had the last thing not happened, I'd probably merely be ambivalent about this day, but alack and alas, that is not the case at all.

February 14 will forever be known as “Single Awareness Day” for me, no matter how well my lovelife turns out. I feel that it's the least I could do to make this day less painful for those who dread waking up to an endless barrage of chocolates, flowers, and dates, none meant for them at all.

The Difference Between Valentine’s And Single Awareness Day

.:The Difference Between Valentine’s And Single Awareness Day:.

February 14 is a day I long for every year.

Valentine’s Day is wonderful! It’s a day where I love her just a little more sweetly, kiss her just a little more tenderly, and hug her just a little more tightly. Valentine’s day reminds me that love is truly all around me, and that I am part of that world. I realize that in the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything.

Valentine’s Day is unbelievably kind to this loving heart. It asks of me but one simple thing, and I am willingly powerless to resist, more so on this very day itself: to cherish, to adore, to reminisce, and to love like I have never loved before. Put my deepest affections inside a Hallmark card that she may keep it with her forever.

February 14 is a day I dread every year.

Single Awareness Day is wretched! It’s a day where I remember when I had her more vividly, feel the loneliness of her leaving me more intensely, and wallow in the pain when she found someone else more bitterly. Single Awareness day reminds me that love is truly all around me, but it simply isn’t meant for someone like me. I realize that in the arithmetic of love, two minus one equals nothing.

Single Awareness Day is immeasurably callous to this broken heart. It asks of me but one cruel thing, and I am hopelessly powerless to resist, more so on this very day itself: to pine, to long for, to break down, and to love like I have never loved before. Put my deepest affections inside a Hallmark card that they may earn a living on this day.

(Inspired by the poem “Awit Para Kay Anna”, by Eduardo Calasanz)