Silent love is calling faith...
There's a calm serenity that's come over me recently, after a bout with a lot of anger and hurt that took so much out of me. Now, I can breathe again. I can smile again. And ultimately, it's a smile that comes from within, not because I need someone to prop me up to be happy.
That's progress. I don't think I've felt this way in years, and I'm grateful I feel like this now.
To shatter me through your hallways...
It's easy to just allow myself to be broken. To walk through the memories and feel the crush of what has come before. But that isn't what I need. That isn't what's going to get me anywhere. I'm happy in spite of the things going on around me, and that's a beautiful place to find myself in.
I hope it lasts. But if it doesn't, at least, I know it's a point I can reach.
Into echoes you can feel...
The past is integral, yes. Despite that, the past should be a building block, not a stumbling block. There's so much more I can achieve, learning from what has come before, and what to expect from this point on. It's a magical feeling, knowing that I'm not meant for this drudgery forever. Surprise, surprise. I can move on! And here I thought that was never going to happen.
And rehearse the way you heal...
I was going through a lot the past few months. I was hurt, I was angry, and boy, was I really just not in a good place when all these woes piled on each other in rapid succession. But I had to keep willing myself on. I realize that sometimes, it just plain doesn't work, but sometimes, we also just don't want to try when we really, really should.
Time does heal all wounds. But you have to keep from picking at the scabs in your moments of weakness. Otherwise, it won't ever really go away.
Make them dance, just like you...
Dance like nobody's watching. Love like you've never had your heart broken before. But through it all, don't lose sight of yourself. It's really easy to ignore your own wants and needs when your heart is on the line, but if you do, it's much easier to pick up the pieces afterwards if things go downhill. And trust me: more often than not, they do head downhill.
'Cause you make me move...
My soul moves in tune with the universe. I don't really believe in new age bull, but in my moments of quiet, I recognize where I am headed and what I have to do far better. Introspection works. It really does. And I'm glad that no matter how little blogging time I have left nowadays, I still use that time to do all this introspection.
Yeah you always make me go...
It's the call that I need to answer. The call within me. Why do you need to have your spirits moved by just one person, when you have a whole universe that could move you instead? Isn't that something worth pursuing, something worth believing in?
I'll run away with your footsteps...
So finally, if and when I do open my heart to someone again, I could give my all. Because there is a whole all of me to give away, rather than a broken and scarred shell of myself. I could just get away from it all and not have any fear, knowing full well that even if my heart would break, it wouldn't be the end of the world. And why would it be? There's so much more out there.
I'll build a city that dreams for two...
To whoever you are, or whoever you will be, let's build this city together. A beautiful city that focuses on what we have become and what we will be, rather than what we used to be. Let's build this city.
But let's not build it on rock and roll.
I have done so much soul searching in the past five years or so, but even though I may find my moments of bleakness, I'm ready for what the universe has to bring now. Somewhere, somehow, it will happen, and in the end...
And if you lose yourself, I will find you...
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