Emo...

Foolish Heart
by Steve Perry

I need a love that grows
I don't want it unless I know

Love comes and goes, but what one would hope for is a love that grows. When I put my mind into it, I know all too well that I shouldn't be giving my heart out to someone unless I know that it wouldn't be an effort gone to waste.

I know, I know, I know. But what I know can't quite add up with what I feel. What may seem to be madness on the surface, is something that has reasons that run so deep and is far more complex than a mere feeling that I am just entertaining.

With each passing hour
Someone somehow
Will be there, ready to share

Love isn't always something that comes along mutually. I truly wish I could expect one whom I'd love to love me back as well, but it doesn't work that way. That's why when I think about it, I don't want to love or so much as give my affection to someone whom I'm unsure of. If I can't begin to expect reciprocation, why even bother, right?

Easier said than done.

I need a love that's strong
I'm so tired of being alone

I don't want a fling. I don't want a kissing buddy. I don't want a fleeting relationship. I want something that could last for me. I wear my heart on my sleeve precisely because whenever I give out my heart to someone, I always expect it to be my last. Quite simply, I don't want to just give my heart out to someone and still end up being alone after the fact.

Again, easier said than done.

But will my lonely heart play the part
Of the fool again
Before I begin

Tanga. That's the best way to explain why I am this way. Then again, perhaps the best way to put it in the vernacular is, nagpapakatanga para sa iyo.

I know, I know, I know. Despite that, my heart doesn't quite see things the same way my head does.

I'm feeling that feeling again
I'm playing a game I can't win

Ever get the feeling that you're just getting played? Ever get the feeling that when you show someone your affection and stick your neck out without them doing the same, that they have so much power over you?

I feel like putty in your hands. I feel like a puppet to every whim and fancy, and all for what? The dim hopes of ever ending up with you?

I never learn. I never do.

Love's knocking on the door
Of my heart once more

Or is it, really? How sure am I it's really love knocking on the door of my heart once more? What if I'm only deluding myself and pushing myself into something and proving time and again that I would've been one of those kids who can never quite pass the marshmallow test?

It sometimes hits a frustrating crescendo, and then I'd act in a way that I would completely regret, after all has been said and done. One would wish that things didn't work that way for me, that throughout it all, I'd keep that deliberate pace in building towards love, but time and again, I rush and ruin everything for myself.

Now, you've lost your respect for me. You've lost your trust, your everything in me. I shudder to think if that one small iota of chance we had to get together, that smallest of sparks if circumstances would just work in our favor, is completely expunged now.

I was stupid. I can't apologize enough for it, nor can I forgive myself for doing that.

I never learn. I never do.

Think I'll let her in
Before I begin

I invest too much. Even though I keep telling myself I shouldn't do that, I know no other way, than to make it a point to make you feel special. To make you feel cherished. All I asked was for you to accept it and yet you couldn't even do that.

It was at this point that I realized that your being nice to me was you sticking your neck out for me. If it were up to you, I know you'd rather just push me away, eradicate me from your life, and move on. You say there's nothing I can do to change that.

I know, I know, I know. But I feel differently about that. Deep down, I know you do, as well.

Foolish heart, hear me calling

I beg my heart to listen to my head just once. It's just too difficult to emotionally drain myself time and again for someone, and inadvertently drain them as well along the way. It's time to put a stop to this, and to rebuild whatever there is left for me to salvage between us.

It's funny. For someone who is known for being one of the most “intellectual” and “cerebral” persons by most people who initially get to know me, I'm apparently one of the most emotional all a the same time.

Stop before you start falling

I pray that I don't fall for you all over again, only to have my foolish heart broken again, all the same. I can't help the way I feel, but I can help the way I think, and I'd want to think of you in a purely Platonic manner unless and until circumstances are in our favor and you are more receptive to the idea of someone loving for you the way I would.

Until then, I shouldn't fall for you. I really, really shouldn't. But how do I do that when I still have to be a part of your life to somehow make something between you and me a possibility? It's a balance I have to strike, and it's a matter of trial and error. I'm sorry if I have failed in that regard.

Foolish heart, heed my warning

My heart would just keep getting broken if I don't change pace. I recognize that much. But whenever I think of you, a smile comes over my face, and I forget all that I know in the face of someone as beautiful and as wonderful as you.

Please forgive me for feeling that way. Please forgive me if you are my cause for joy. I guess you're just someone special who just really struck me from out of the blue with a vengeance. I can't begin to explain how that feeling just envelopes me awash and I fee light-headed and fuzzy all the time, knowing full well despite the feeling that the feeling isn't mutual.

One moment, I was going on along with life, doing just fine. The next moment, you came along, and I end up asking myself how I've been doing without you all this time.

You've been wrong before

My heart has been broken for so many times already that I don't even know how I still find it in me to love someone all over again, or to so much as just show them how special they actually are.

More often than not, I am completely wrong about that person. They aren't quite the person whom I put up on the pedestal. They aren't quite the penultimate wonderful people that I saw them to be.

Don't be wrong any more

And yet, was my heart ever really wrong, per se? Or isn't it the case that when I see your imperfections, I learn to appreciate you even more, and learn how it is to accept someone, so-called flaws and all, because I know I myself am far from perfect?

Has it ever really been wrong? Or has it just been a case of me carrying myself in a way that could've been better?

Most of us would go about life without giving all this a second thought. After all, life is just a biological process that goes on and on for as long as God wills it to be so.

Then again, life isn't all about how many breaths you take, or how many times your heart beats. Life, more than that, is all about how many moments take your breath away, and how many times your heart skips a beat.

For you. All for you.

Foolish, foolish, foolish heart. You'll never learn.

.:It Never Stops: The Unsent Series, Vol. II, Part I:.

Dear Affection,

It would appear you and Marcelle have come to a point of deadlock. While he wishes to be given the chance to make you feel special, you simply don't want that because of the circumstances that envelope the situation.

Marcelle understands that you're both equally stubborn in opposite directions he refuses to yield, you refuse to compromise. Somehow, that just feels sad. Because you know all too well he cares about you, yet because of all these self-fulfilling prophecies, how can it be any other way than that both of you simply cannot ever hope to get along?

You believe this to be the most emotionally draining “relationship” you've ever taken part in, and Marcelle cannot apologize enough for that. All he ever really wants is to make you happy. All he really wants is to somehow make you come to realize that the circumstances are worth working around for the betterment of one another.

Is it really too late for a chance to make things right? Is it really too late for an “us” to speak of? Or are you and he just really not trying hard enough? Does he really expect too much? Do you really want none of this? Or perhaps has he merely failed the marshmallow test again?

The last thing he'd ever want is to make you sad, or to hurt you. After all, he wishes to shower all his affection upon you and make you feel special in every single way that he could. Marcelle is sorry with all his heart, and all he wants right now is to do right by you.

Please, dear affection... don't let you and he be victims of circumstances. Don't let it all fall to naught and be a monumental waste of time for the both of you. Both of you deserve far better than that.

Sigh...

Foolish Heart
by Steve Perry

I need a love that grows
I don't want it unless I know

Love comes and goes, but what one would hope for is a love that grows. When I put my mind into it, I know all too well that I shouldn't be giving my heart out to someone unless I know that it wouldn't be an effort gone to waste.

I know, I know, I know. But what I know can't quite add up with what I feel. What may seem to be madness on the surface, is something that has reasons that run so deep and is far more complex than a mere feeling that I am just entertaining.

With each passing hour
Someone somehow
Will be there, ready to share

Love isn't always something that comes along mutually. I truly wish I could expect one whom I'd love to love me back as well, but it doesn't work that way. That's why when I think about it, I don't want to love or so much as give my affection to someone whom I'm unsure of. If I can't begin to expect reciprocation, why even bother, right?

Easier said than done.

I need a love that's strong
I'm so tired of being alone

I don't want a fling. I don't want a kissing buddy. I don't want a fleeting relationship. I want something that could last for me. I wear my heart on my sleeve precisely because whenever I give out my heart to someone, I always expect it to be my last. Quite simply, I don't want to just give my heart out to someone and still end up being alone after the fact.

Again, easier said than done.

But will my lonely heart play the part
Of the fool again
Before I begin

Tanga. That's the best way to explain why I am this way. Then again, perhaps the best way to put it in the vernacular is, nagpapakatanga para sa iyo.

I know, I know, I know. Despite that, my heart doesn't quite see things the same way my head does.

I'm feeling that feeling again
I'm playing a game I can't win

Ever get the feeling that you're just getting played? Ever get the feeling that when you show someone your affection and stick your neck out without them doing the same, that they have so much power over you?

I feel like putty in your hands. I feel like a puppet to every whim and fancy, and all for what? The dim hopes of ever ending up with you?

I never learn. I never do.

Love's knocking on the door
Of my heart once more

Or is it, really? How sure am I it's really love knocking on the door of my heart once more? What if I'm only deluding myself and pushing myself into something and proving time and again that I would've been one of those kids who can never quite pass the marshmallow test?

It sometimes hits a frustrating crescendo, and then I'd act in a way that I would completely regret, after all has been said and done. One would wish that things didn't work that way for me, that throughout it all, I'd keep that deliberate pace in building towards love, but time and again, I rush and ruin everything for myself.

Now, you've lost your respect for me. You've lost your trust, your everything in me. I shudder to think if that one small iota of chance we had to get together, that smallest of sparks if circumstances would just work in our favor, is completely expunged now.

I was stupid. I can't apologize enough for it, nor can I forgive myself for doing that.

I never learn. I never do.

Think I'll let her in
Before I begin

I invest too much. Even though I keep telling myself I shouldn't do that, I know no other way, than to make it a point to make you feel special. To make you feel cherished. All I asked was for you to accept it and yet you couldn't even do that.

It was at this point that I realized that your being nice to me was you sticking your neck out for me. If it were up to you, I know you'd rather just push me away, eradicate me from your life, and move on. You say there's nothing I can do to change that.

I know, I know, I know. But I feel differently about that. Deep down, I know you do, as well.

Foolish heart, hear me calling

I beg my heart to listen to my head just once. It's just too difficult to emotionally drain myself time and again for someone, and inadvertently drain them as well along the way. It's time to put a stop to this, and to rebuild whatever there is left for me to salvage between us.

It's funny. For someone who is known for being one of the most “intellectual” and “cerebral” persons by most people who initially get to know me, I'm apparently one of the most emotional all a the same time.

Stop before you start falling

I pray that I don't fall for you all over again, only to have my foolish heart broken again, all the same. I can't help the way I feel, but I can help the way I think, and I'd want to think of you in a purely Platonic manner unless and until circumstances are in our favor and you are more receptive to the idea of someone loving for you the way I would.

Until then, I shouldn't fall for you. I really, really shouldn't. But how do I do that when I still have to be a part of your life to somehow make something between you and me a possibility? It's a balance I have to strike, and it's a matter of trial and error. I'm sorry if I have failed in that regard.

Foolish heart, heed my warning

My heart would just keep getting broken if I don't change pace. I recognize that much. But whenever I think of you, a smile comes over my face, and I forget all that I know in the face of someone as beautiful and as wonderful as you.

Please forgive me for feeling that way. Please forgive me if you are my cause for joy. I guess you're just someone special who just really struck me from out of the blue with a vengeance. I can't begin to explain how that feeling just envelopes me awash and I fee light-headed and fuzzy all the time, knowing full well despite the feeling that the feeling isn't mutual.

One moment, I was going on along with life, doing just fine. The next moment, you came along, and I end up asking myself how I've been doing without you all this time.

You've been wrong before

My heart has been broken for so many times already that I don't even know how I still find it in me to love someone all over again, or to so much as just show them how special they actually are.

More often than not, I am completely wrong about that person. They aren't quite the person whom I put up on the pedestal. They aren't quite the penultimate wonderful people that I saw them to be.

Don't be wrong any more

And yet, was my heart ever really wrong, per se? Or isn't it the case that when I see your imperfections, I learn to appreciate you even more, and learn how it is to accept someone, so-called flaws and all, because I know I myself am far from perfect?

Has it ever really been wrong? Or has it just been a case of me carrying myself in a way that could've been better?

Most of us would go about life without giving all this a second thought. After all, life is just a biological process that goes on and on for as long as God wills it to be so.

Then again, life isn't all about how many breaths you take, or how many times your heart beats. Life, more than that, is all about how many moments take your breath away, and how many times your heart skips a beat.

For you. All for you.

Foolish, foolish, foolish heart. You'll never learn.

.:It Never Stops: The Unsent Series, Vol. II, Part I:.

Dear Affection,

It would appear you and Marcelle have come to a point of deadlock. While he wishes to be given the chance to make you feel special, you simply don't want that because of the circumstances that envelope the situation.

Marcelle understands that you're both equally stubborn in opposite directions he refuses to yield, you refuse to compromise. Somehow, that just feels sad. Because you know all too well he cares about you, yet because of all these self-fulfilling prophecies, how can it be any other way than that both of you simply cannot ever hope to get along?

You believe this to be the most emotionally draining “relationship” you've ever taken part in, and Marcelle cannot apologize enough for that. All he ever really wants is to make you happy. All he really wants is to somehow make you come to realize that the circumstances are worth working around for the betterment of one another.

Is it really too late for a chance to make things right? Is it really too late for an “us” to speak of? Or are you and he just really not trying hard enough? Does he really expect too much? Do you really want none of this? Or perhaps has he merely failed the marshmallow test again?

The last thing he'd ever want is to make you sad, or to hurt you. After all, he wishes to shower all his affection upon you and make you feel special in every single way that he could. Marcelle is sorry with all his heart, and all he wants right now is to do right by you.

Please, dear affection... don't let you and he be victims of circumstances. Don't let it all fall to naught and be a monumental waste of time for the both of you. Both of you deserve far better than that.

Film Review: The Prestige

.:Film Review: The Prestige:.

Obviously, SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

The Prestige
Forget watching it closely. Watch it many freaking times!

“Brilliant” and “star-studded” are but two of the mildest of words one can use to describe this Nolan masterpiece, based on the book of the same title. This movie follows the story of two rival magicians, The Professor (Christian Bale), and The Great Danton (Hugh Jackman). This movie really starts off with a bang, as we see the Great Danton drown to death, and the Professor on trial for his supposed murder.

From there, the story unfolds and we begin to see a very sinister tale of rivalry and obsession. After the Professor accidentally kills Danton's wife, they embark on a quest of one-upmanship as they attempt to wreck each other's careers, which comes to a high point when the Professor comes up with the magic to end all magics: the Transporter Man, which involves him tossing a rubber ball, going inside a door on one side of the stage, and then exiting from the other side of the stage and catching the rubber ball at the same time.

Danton puzzles over how to do this amazing effect, and their mentor, played by Michael Caine, suggested that it may simply be a case of having a double, and even if that wouldn't be the case, they still went ahead and did it. They got Danton a double, and he made an apparently more exciting version of the effect: this time, Danton throws a hat into the air, goes into a door, and then his double exits from the door on the other side and catches his hat.

The rivalry escalates further when Danton turns to Nikolai Tesla, who builds him a machine that supposedly does a transporter man effect that is nothing short of stunning. It turns out though that this wasn't just a transporter man effect done by science. It was, quite simply a cloning machine. Now, Danton had a way to be in two places at once, albeit the problem was obvious: every time he used the machine, he'd have a clone of himself. What had to be done, then?

And that leads to the first scene of the movie once more. This time, it makes sense. Danton deliberately drowns himself every night so that there will only be one Danton at any given time. He doesn't know if he'd end up in the tank, or if he'd end up in the Prestige. With the twists and turns they have sent each other through, it became clear that it was only a matter of time before Danton implicated Professor in his “murder” once he tries snooping around and seeing how the effect is achieved.

With Danton still alive, he discovers, to his surprise, that although hung to die, so is the Professor, who turns out to be one half of a pair of twins, both of whom play the Professor role alternatingly, lending to the ultimate sacrifice: a half-life.

The plot was rich in revisionist but intriguing history, and the way they treated stage magic was nothing short of a wonder. They really made the intricate workings of the industry a big deal, and of course, the Wolverine vs. Batman dynamic really upped the ante. Every member of the cast simply stood out in their respective roles, and I cannot help but want to see the movie again, considering the seemingly allegorical reference they make to the two magicians and the ultimate obsession that kills one and permanently changes the other.

Truth be told, this movie was an exciting romp, from top to bottom. I can understand precisely why Bale practically begged for his role in the film, because he more than justified his presence in the movie with his stellar performance, as did Jackman, Johanson, and of course, Caine.

If there's only one movie you should watch this year and you're not exactly a fan of comic books, then this is the film I would unwaveringly recommend to you.

“Fun” Evaluation: A+
“Critical” Evaluation: A+

Finally, Posts!

.:It's Great Seeing You Again...:.

Christelle is one of my best friends for years, and I haven't seen her for a long while, considering how wonky both our schedules have been with each other for the most part. Despite that, we still try our best to keep up with the news with each other, mainly through SMS messages and reading each other's LJ updates.

Last Monday, Chris and I just caught up with each other and really enjoyed each other's company after practically two years of not meeting up. We met in Megamall, and little has changed. It's like we never lost touch, really, as I still remembered precisely why she's one of my dearest friends for so many years already, and I'm extremely happy about hearing her stories about her other profitable endeavors and so forth.

In any case, we had dinner at Teriyaki Boy, where we ended up swapping loads of stories, mostly stuff that we've been missing out on since we last met up. I know there isn't really much to say about the meeting as far as specific events go, but our conversations were really insightful, as I learned more and more how she's been enjoying herself in the meantime, and well, perhaps, find opportunities for the both of us to meet up some more, all the same.

I'm glad to have had dinner and engaging conversation with Chris last Monday. It's been a blast, and one can hope that we find more opportunities to meet up with each other.

Same invitation goes to *jaded*, of course. ;)

Quite honestly, Christelle does remind me a lot of Clair... and vice versa... =P

.:Little Magical Steps:.

So Clair believes I should call myself “Kel the Magic Mushroom” to combine my air name and my intended stage name, “Magikel” (I keed, I keed.). Today, I had my first attempt at genuine publicity as I performed magic tricks for a few teachers and some kids of Second Mom pre-school while they had their Halloween party before their semestral break. It was all good, really, and I think I acquitted myself well enough with “Free Chance”, “Nest of Coin Boxes”, “Cardtoon”, “Coin Paddle”, and parts of “Liquid Metal”.

In any case, I have a good number of effects I can use, and I've been doing pretty well with it lately. Hopefully, I can continue to improve, because I know I've definitely progressed a heck of a lot in the mere three weeks I've been trying to get into magic again...

My gratitude to Elbert for asking me to go to the party where he was a judge for the costume party, among other things. Antoinette Taus was also there, and I saw Jimmy, an old friend, who is apparently teaching there now, and came to the party as Shrek, which was something I won't let him live down... heh.

.:JGL, Assemble!:.

Well, not everyone, but Clair, Sean, and Ranulf were with me and April at the premiere of “The Prestige”, and I managed to procure five tickets for us. While we got there relatively late mainly because Eric Mana and Gia were already hosting the premiere, I still went ahead to the front of the stage and took part in the whole thing. That being said, the movie was great, and as usual, I practiced my magic some more. At this point, my goal is simply to be able to master most of my stuff by the end of my vacation leave, as this is already the last week for me, which is a bit sad, but I guess all good things must come to an end... heh.

After the film, we hung out a bit more at Gloria Jean's before we finally called it a night... it was way, way cool. =)

Another Update..

.:Did I Mention To You That...:.

... well, for hosting the WWE Smackdown Tour Press Conference, they actually paid me?

I would've gladly paid them for the honor of introducing King Bookah!

.:Today's Headlines!:.

- Tindero ng karne nasagasaan, naging gulay!!!
- Capt. Hook dumaan sa Quiapo, pinirata!!!
- Palaisdaan, nasunog!!!
- Tahanang walang hagdan, inakyat!!!
- Bakla sumali sa away, napasubo!!!
- Bagong tuli nagyabang, lumaki ang ulo!!!
- Unang madre, napagkamalang penguin!!!
- Bulag nakapatay, nagdilim daw ang paningin!!!
- Iceman nanood ng porno, nag init!!!
- Tindera ng suka, tinoyo!!!
- Teacher nagkamali, tinuruan ng leksyon!!!
- Eroplano nag crash, lahat ng pasahero namatay ayon sa mga survivors!!!!
- Basurero nag sampa ng kaso, binasura!!!
- Dahil may reklamo, eskwelahan ng mga bingi nag noise barrage!!!
- Tubero, nagka-tulo!!!
- Lalaki natagpuang pugot ang ulo, inaalam pa kung buhay!!!
- Barbero tumestigo sa krimen ayaw paniwalaan!!!
- Misis ng photgrapher, nakunan!!!
- Tindera ng tubig, namatay sa uhaw!!!
- Kaso ng pilay, nilalakad!!!
- Invisible Man, nakita na!!!
- Bakla lumuhod sa simbahan, pinalabas!!!
- Labandera nagkamali, sinabon!!!
- Janitor sumali sa basketball, nilampaso!!!
- Dahil lagi raw tulog, guwardiya binantayan!!!

.:Simple Joys:.

There are times in life where you come across a person you've known for so long, but only really manage to bond with after a long time.

Camy (Francisco.) is one of those people.

Yesterday, I made a beeline for the ICA fair, which I found to be rather boring, and the blaring music didn't provide me with ample opportunity to really make a valid go at street magic. Nonetheless, there weren't too many attractions as the booths were so-so, and the sights (Ahem.) weren't particularly stellar. Despite that, running into some friends while walking around there was pretty fun, and I do believe that if I just managed to muster up the nerve, I can finally try my hand at being just a street magician for fun.

So since I was bored out of my wits, and since I knew Camy lived near the area, we were already in touch even before I got there, and she told me to meet her at Starbucks around 6 in the evening. Anyways, that being said, we met up, and we just really had a very engaging conversation with each other.

Truth be told, it was way cool and really fun hanging out with her. Talking to Camy has proven to be a very enlightening endeavor, and I'm glad I did just that. She was just telling me about things she's been going through recently, while I introduced her to Mr. Bing, and then after a while, I walked her back to her house, which was a long but insight-filled walk, since really now, we haven't ever really been able to talk to each other that much.

I wish her the best.

.:The Geek Gene Is Also Found In Females...:.

One of the most ignorant articles (By a female, of all people!) regarding female geeks came out in the Toronto Star, where we were treated to a very insightful Q and A of insipid attempts at what I can only hope was comedy and not outright idiocy.

I can understand the jokes made in the article about having pink colors as a means of attracting female programmers, as it's a bit tongue-in-cheek, but there are just some outright inane comments that really make me think the writer was just downright offensive.

Take this quote on for size:

Do you think fewer women are getting involved in technology because they're not as interested in it, or are they just not smart enough?

What? You mean to tell me that being male or female determines your freaking IQ? This, coming from a female writer? I don't know about you, but hearing something as absolutely ridiculous as that just really grates on me. It flies in the face of the progress we supposedly have made from the dark ages, where we no longer expect being male or female to automatically limit the kind of things they can do, especially in the realm of the intellectual.

On top of that, what I find to be annoying about the tone of the article is the assertion that making babies is a distraction for female techies. What makes technology any different from any other career that women are already prominent in? If “making babies” wasn't a “distraction” from women in those other career paths, why technology, then?

Can we please, please, please, learn to move away from the stupid dark ages already? I thought that went out of fashion since Vanilla Ice already...

Wheeee!!!

.:Today's LSS:.

Such an upbeat-sounding song with really depressing lyrics...

Hey Ya
by OutKast

One two three uh!

My baby don't mess around
Because she loves me so
And this I know for shooo..
Uh, But does she really wanna
But can't stand to see me
Walk out the dooor..
Don't try to fight the feelin'
Because the thought alone is killing me right nooww..
Uh, thank god for mom and dad
For sticking two together
'Cause we don't know hooowww...
UH!

CHORUS:
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa..
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa..
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa..
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa..
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa..
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa..
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa..
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa..

You think you've got it
Ohh, you think you've got it
But got it just don't get it
Till' there's nothing at
AaaaaaaaAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaallllll..
We get together
Ohh, we get together
But seperate's always better when there's feelings
InvooooooOOOOOOOoooooooOOOOOOooooooOOOOOlved
If what they say is "Nothing is forever"
Then what makes, Then what makes, Then what makes
Then what makes, Then what makes LOOVVEEE?
(Love exception) So why you, why you
Why you, why you, why you are we so in denial
When we know we're not happy heeeerrreeee...
Y'all don't want me here you just wanna dance

CHORUS:
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (Don't want to meet your daddy, OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (Just want you in my Caddy OHH OH)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH, don't want to meet yo' mama OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (Just wan't to make you cumma OHH OH)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (I'm, OHH OH I'm, OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (I'm just being honest OHH OH, I'm just being honest)

Hey, alright now
Alright now fellas, (YEAH!)
Now what's cooler than bein' cool?
(ICE COLD!) I can't hear ya'
I say what's cooler than bein' cool?
(ICE COLD!) whooo...
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, Ok now ladies, (YEAH!)
And we gon' break this thing down in just a few seconds
Now don't have me break this thang down for nothin'
Now I wanna see y'all on y'all baddest behavior
Lend me some suga', I am your neighbor ahh here we go!
Shake it, shake, shake it, shake it (OHH OH)
Shake it, shake it, shake, shake it, shake it, shake it (OHH OH)
Shake it, shake it like a Polaroid Picture, shake it, shake it
Shh you got to, shake it, shh shake it, shake it, got to shake it
(Shake it Suga') shake it like a Poloroid Picture

Now while Beyonce's and Lucy Lui's
And baby dolls, get on the floor
(Get on the floor)
You know what to dooo..
You know what to dooo..
You know what to do!

CHORUS:
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (Uh oh, Hey Ya)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (Uh, uh, OHH OH)
Heeeyyy... Yaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)
Heeyy Yaaaaaaaa.. (OHH OH)

.:Made My Day:.

A new friend of mine told me this and it made my day...

I always thought magicians were awesome. Being a DJ and a magician is like being made of pure win. XD

Needless to say, that was one of the biggest compliments I've ever heard over the weekend.

.:The Secrets Of Street Magicians Revealed:.

I began to realize why I absolutely hate those “Exposed” episodes where they attempt to uncover the secrets behind something, and this was underscored by what I saw from last night's “The Secrets Of Street Magicians Revealed”.

You see, the problem isn't the fact that they're revealing secrets of magicians to public, which is already a problem in and by itself, especially if they don't respect the intellectual property of the magicians who came up with this or that trick. Magic, being an industry, is being undermined by expose's like this, and I don't find it fair. How would Coke feel if their formula showed up in an "Exposed" episode? It ruins the business and hurts the industry.

That's one big enough problem, but my main bone to pick with them is the condescending tone by which they try to downplay magic.

One thing I learned from Mr. Bing Lim-It, the owner of what I deem to be the best magic shop in the entire country (It's also a sex toy shop! Now beat that.), is that magicians are supposed to entertain first, and then baffle and amaze second. Entertaining magicians will become remembered. Baffling magicians will have their tricks, not them, remembered.

Now, what does this have to do with the so-called documentary's condescending tone? Why, everything. You see, the problem with trying to undermine magic the way “The Secrets...” did was that it was constantly reminding everyone that it wasn't real magic.

Well, duh. Who would've thought it wasn't real magic? The point of the matter is that people have to realize that it's all in the fun of pulling something off and getting away with it and getting some smiles and awe along the way.

I know a lot of magician secrets. And yet, because I know the kind of practice or the kind of sleight necessary to pull those off, I still am amazed at how they do it, and even if my sharper than usual eyes catch some funny movements going on, I let it slide and keep my mouth shut instead of exposing the magician in front of me by calling attention to a coin he palmed, or to a card he has hidden in his backhand. Only when a magician begins to believe in his own hype and thinks he has genuine magical powers would I begin to not feel inclined to be so passive about the little things I notice when watching the magician.

Magic is all about appreciating seeing something out of the ordinary. Magicians are entertainers first, and mystics second. It's a bit easy to confuse these roles, but if magicians were all mystics, then one would realize that there's so little that sets them apart from each other. They all do the same tricks, they all do the same techniques. It's the personalities that would make one different from the other, and y'know what, that isn't quite a “secret” a “documentary” can teach you.

I would've had less problems with the whole show if only they stuck to exposing secrets and didn't insert snide remarks about street magicians along the way. At the end of the day, it's still a job, and if it weren't for the expose, I'd have to say these street magicians were doing a damned good job in the first place, which leaves no room for the snide remarks thrown their way.

Hehehehhee..

.:Rocking Comicon:.

I met up with Elbert and Estelle and Chino to go to the Comicon where Chino was a finalist for the Lead Slinger contest. In there, I ran into the usual people like Jac and Jonas, and Dominique also showed up, for good measure.

Anyways, there wasn't really much going on, and in fact, I had an interesting time practicing my magic stuff as I saw Camy, and made some new acquaintances aside from that. For lunch, I was with Estelle and her debate partner as they made their battle plan and I helped in the least way I could, giving anecdotal tips and all that, at the very least. Afterwards, we went back.

Of course, when Camy and Estelle met again, Camy looked for Elbert first before she kissed Estelle on the cheek. Apparently, she didn't want to feed El's lez fetish. Hahahaha. After all that, and meeting one of the guys I was a fan of, Mr. Gilbert Monsanto, I ended up seeing someone who caught my eye.

Turns out her name is Addy Dy, and since I was too shy to just walk up to her and introduce myself, I decided to pull an elaborate attempt to get to know her with help from Jonas, who acted as the guy who would record the magic on camera. He did record it, and he told me he'd try uploading it on YouTube, in any case.

So there I was, with no street magic performances to my name, but I just wanted to give it a try. Real elaborate, but I did the Cardtoon trick and the Coin Box nest, and both tricks just really worked like a charm, and I was extremely pleased how well I pulled it off. Heh. Anyways, given all that, she told me I did well, although I looked really nervous after the fact, and all that. I didn't have the nerve to ask her number, though, so I had to turn to Camy (Who already got her number prior to that.) for help in that department, and we've been exchanging text messages lately.

(Turns out she's a very interesting girl. She likes anime and manga, reads comics, and also has a mild interest in wrestling. It was definitely awesome... heh.)

.:Night:.

So afterwards, El, 'Elle, and I met up with April at Seattle's Best, where I ran across Diane by coincidence. It was a pretty good day, although given how El will be in Malabon, and Estelle will be in Baguio, it'd be a while before I meet them again, so there was a mild amount of sadness in that last gathering for the moment. Nonetheless, it still worked pretty well, and I was teaching Estelle how to do the Coin Paddle trick.

Afterwards, Elbert stayed behind for his mom to fetch him, and April, 'Elle, and I went off to Greenhills so I can go and get some more stuff from Mr. Bing and he really had nice stories for the three of us. April and Estelle were mystified by Mr. Bing as always, and we had a great time, to say the least.

From there, we just had a road trip, although one of the most awkward moments turned up at that point. April's bag was on my lap, and she was looking for something in her bag, so her hands rummaged through the bag and I had to sheepishly tell her to stop because I didn't want her finding something she didn't want to find in her bag... hahahaha.

Boom...

.:The Grudge 2:.

El, 'Elle, ND, and myself watched The Grudge 2, and we definitely had fun with it. ND and I were seated beside each other, and in front were the two scaredy cats, Elbert and Estelle.

Let's just say that after the whole thing, I don't think El or 'Elle wanted to go to sleep.

I'll be sparse with the details, but Grudge 2 was loads better than Ju-On 2. Weird, huh?

.:Stunned And Starstruck:.

And so I boarded with Gia last Friday so that after our show in the morning, we can head off to Gateway Cinema for the press conference for Smackdown.

What neither of us knew was that we weren't just going to go to the press conference: we were hosting it.

I don't know about you, but I was beside myself with glee when we did the press conference, seeing how I was going to be seeing Michelle McCool, Sharmell, Batista, and Booker T. King Booker was amazing during the press conference, seeing how he was mainly the mouthpiece for everyone during the part where the press was asking them questions. The really cool thing about it was that he was, for the most part, always in character. He really went ahead and stayed on King Booker mode until some parts where he talked about his life and Rey Mysterio, and at that point, he reverted to his usual Booker T persona (No British accent.).

On the other hand, Queen Sharmell stayed in character all throughout, and it was so fun. Michelle McCool didn't act the least bit heelish and seemed like a nice girl. She was taken aback though when Sib asked that very rude question about whether or not the WWE approves of implants and how he's been staring at them. I'm glad King Booker answered that in a way only he could...

You pathetic peasant! It should be enough for you to know that they are beautiful. Nothing more.

Pwn3d by the King. I loved it.

For those wondering, Undertaker got into the country only on Saturday, and he doesn't do autographs or press cons or public appearances to maintain his deadman gimmick. Oh, well. That's too bad...

Booker and Batista had a nice rapport going on, as Booker was joking around in character, and Batista was feigning ignorance, not knowing what a “scallywag” was. It was really funny, and I enjoyed the way they played off each other, though I found the press closing in on us and pushing the hosts (Me, Gia, and Anthony Suntay.) out of the way to get a good shot of the Smackdown stars. Regardless, I'm sure I had a lot of pictures taken of me with Booker, since I was standing beside him most of the time.

I didn't like that the press not only made it claustrophobic for us, but they also didn't like asking questions until the tailend of the whole thing. It was a bit off-putting, to say the least, and I had to take it upon myself to ask questions myself whenever there was a lull so that the Smackdown people wouldn't feel like the press was disinterested.

After the press conference, we were brusquely pushed out to the point that we couldn't ask for autographs and stuff from the wrestlers anymore, so to make up for it, the organizers let us meet up with Chavo Guererro and Bobby Lashley from the meet and greet, and the atmosphere there, since there was not much press, wasn't nearly as claustrophobic, and neither Chavo nor Bobby were in character for the most part. They were talking about hopes and dreams, about the fact that it was Chavo's birthday on that day, and so forth.

My favorite part of the meet and greet was when Chavo asked the audience if they had any places to recommend, and somebody suggested “Embassy”. Bobby reiterates he's single (Chavo's married with kids, in contrast.), and then says he'll be at Embassy tonight. I was hoping somebody would suggest Chico's, or Adonis, or Gigolo, but nobody tried it out. Still, Embassy was punchline enough.

One of the security guys, a Filipino, was a dead ringer for Bobby Lashley. Tony Tony, the host of the meet and greet, asked if they were brothers, and when the security guy stood beside Bobby, cameras started flashing. They really looked alike. Same bald head, same creases along the neck, both muscular, similar eyes, and so forth. It was just that Bobby was taller and probably had more muscles.

We had some autographs signed by Chavo and Bobby afterwards, and even had pictures taken with them. They were really nice people, and Chavo was joking about writing over Batista's autograph on my title belt, as he looked in dismay at the nameplate with Batista's signature on it and went, “Why did he do that?”.

Bobby, on the other hand, was all smiles when he had a picture taken with me and he had my belt on his shoulder. He declared it a rare picture: Lashley with a championship belt. Hehehehe.

That was a day made of pure win, to say the least.

Pictures to follow...

w00t!

.:Boom!:.

Guess who's going to the Smackdown press conference on Friday?

Oooohhhhh, yeah...

.:All Over The Place:.

The thing I noticed about me lately is that I've been so occupied with work and hanging out with friends that my blogging has been taking a severe hit. I think what really wrecks my blogging habits is the fact that I don't get too much input from other minds greater than I when it comes to contemplative thought except in one of those rare moments where El, 'Elle, and I end up doing nothing more than just philosophizing, but those moments are few and far in between.

In exchange for that, I have to admit that the goings-on in my life have gotten to be extremely more exciting. From meeting new people to trying new things to learning new tricks, this old dog is still going... heh.

I woke up when September ended, and I realized that this isn't the worst year of my life, despite how it initially felt. It turns out that in reality, this year has been a year for me to really make even bigger changes than I already did last year.

Last year was a matter of survival. I was evicted from my house, I had to find a way to make ends meet and still save along somewhat.

This year was a matter of revival. I had to rediscover what it took for me to press on in the face of adversity from within, and without automatically turning to a significant other as a crutch. While my best friends would be there for me no matter what, they still allowed me to have some moments where I faced problems head-on by myself, and triumphed in spite of it.

This year so far has been nothing but interesting, and with a little under three months to go, I know I made it through what should've been the worst times of my life.

That's precisely why it isn't the worst year of my life.

.:Piling On:.

It's amazing how people can kick a man while he's down.

So Mr. Binay, not one of my favorite people, ended up getting suspended from his mayoral duties in Makati. No big deal, I guess I'm used to stuff like that happening, but what surprised me was that in his attempt to undermine the system, he ended up compounding his troubles.

You see, he was running around with his marine jacket on just the other day to show off his preparedness to fight off his suspension and the accusations leveled his way at the same time. As a marine reserve, he should've known that such a display is actually illegal, and now, the Armed Forces of the Philippines are considering filing a complaint against him for that.

Here's a man who has done a lot for his city, both good and bad. From the paralysis the businesses in Makati have experienced due to the frequent rallies in the city, to the numerous benefits the citizens of Makati have been experiencing, Binay is a man who has polarized a lot of people.

At the end of the day, I hope he doesn't get sued for the uniform issue. I find it petty and nitpicking, and it would be best for him to simply face the music regarding the complaints leveled at him, whether or not he is innocent of these charges. Truth be told, I realize it seems as if he is being singled out (And I wouldn't dispute that he isn't.), but really now, when you go fishing, do you catch all the fish in the sea?

Mmmmm-mmm...:.

I'm watching “Ice Cream Unwrapped” on the Lifestyle Network right now, and I'm drooling. Oh, my gawrsh.

.:It's Definitely Like A Magic:.

As a kid, I've always been fond of doing magic. You might say that it's one of those childhood dreams I never took seriously, but I knew that on some level, I could be some kind of a magician.

Well, fast forward to a decade and a half later, and I'm still an amateur.

While I know that I have a long way to go before I can consider myself any good, it's still definitely way cool that I've been making oodles of progress over the past couple of weeks, far more than I ever have in my entire life, and that's without an unnecessary dependence on trick decks or other similar gimmicks.

In the past few weeks, I've been learning from people far greater than I who shall remain unnamed so that I don't jinx my progress so far.

From videos to hands-on demonstrations to ideas to routine lineups to patter, I've been working on this a lot. It's a talent of sorts that has been on again, off again for me, but now, more than ever, I believe I am capable of a great deal of self-improvement, and I can't help but feel that this is simply a step into the right direction and a way for me to appreciate the value of magic far and beyond mere deception or mysticism.

Magic is part and parcel of life. Sometimes, one simply has to look deeper into one's self to find that thing that inspires awe and wonder, and I guess, in whatever I do, I try to find that “magic” not merely for myself, but for the lives I touch as well. Whether I be a teacher who inspires a student to excel, or a dj whose ideas reach out to an unsuspecting listener, or Hades, a professional wrestler who entices others who see his matches to soar to greater heights, a lot can be said for magic's value in life.

Again, another thing that I have to be thankful for in having allowed me to make it through the year far better than I thought I would...

Bugger Off...

.:Back Off:.

Pardon my French. This post will not be pretty.

Artists have got to have the most petulant and self-absorbed egos I've ever encountered.

Well, not all of them, but the bad ones are just really such characters.

You see, my best friend, Elbert, has been doing comics for the longest time. Sure, he's only 22, but in no way does that make him any less qualified to talk about comics. If anything, the passion that he brings to the table shows to everyone that he is willing to do more than his fair share to help make the Philippine comics industry grow as a whole.

I've seen the man pile on sleepless nights, pour out tears, and almost sweat blood just to get where he is right now.

Next thing I hear, some people who think they know it all see it fit to criticize him for critiquing other people's work.

I'd be the first to say that Elbert isn't the best artist I've ever met. Then again, so? Who died and made these know-it-alls God? Did they think that seniority is some kind of entitlement or guarantee of immunity from criticism? Did they think that it requires excellence in a field for one to be qualified to critique another's work?

Simon Cowell can't sing for crap and yet his word on who can sing well and who can't is law in “American Idol”. Fr. Nick has never directed a single film, yet his film reviews are as good as gold for a lot of people who want to ask what's the next good movie to watch. Phil Jackson was nowhere nearly as good a basketball player as he is a coach. So did anyone expect these people to be any good in the respective fields they supposedly critique? Or have we all forgotten that the best coaches tend to be on the benches?

Why is it, then, that when it comes to comic book artists, people think you have to be good at it for your word to be any good? Why do people think that the amount of time they've been involved in the industry is enough entitlement for them to throw their weight around and question the legitimacy of people other than them? Why? What have they done to make the Philippine industry any better lately, to begin with? Did they think for one moment that Elbert, just because he's maybe young, or perhaps because he's not the best artist in the world, is not qualified to critique, or hasn't, in his own way, and through his own drive and desire, earned the spot that he finds himself in today?

Well, a big “fuck you” to anyone who thinks Elbert's not good enough to do what he does.

What do you know? Who are you to judge him? You come around asking for critique, and then your fragile little ego can't take the heat? Well, then bugger off. I won't mince words and I won't take that kind of crap sitting down. Nobody talks that way about my best friend, and I don't care if you're Leonardo Da Vinci's next of kin, but if your art is crap, then your art is crap. The issue is that Elbert is critiquing art, not coddling artists' egos.

The problem with these artist types who find themselves entitled to better things is that they sit on their asses waiting for things to get better for them, and yet look on in envy as others who may or may not be as talented as they are grab the opportunities they feel should be theirs.

Well, newsflash, retards: you have to get off your ass if you intend to get anywhere. Its always been that way, and always will be that way. You never did anything to merit being born into this universe in the first place, so the universe does not fucking owe you anything. Capische?

Elbert has earned his keep through blood, sweat, and tears. If you feel you deserve better, then do yourself a favor, get off your high horse, and start walking the walk because while you talk about how much better an artist you are, this so-called “bad artist” is running circles around you because you're too busy being engrossed with your grandiose sense of self-worth to realize how much you actually suck at life.

Fission mailed, punks. My only regret was that I wasn't there last Sunday to give a verbal drubbing to anyone who tried to question Elbert's sincerity at helping people. Still, I'm sure, given how I heard things boil down, Elbert pwn3d his pathetic little detractors like the egotistic whiny little bitches that they are.

Unlike certain self-engrossed people, El would rather help everyone including himself rather than just toot his own horn and demand entitlement in an industry that is only as good as your last work.

Don't hate, appreciate. Elbert doesn't get off on telling artists how much they suck. He's actually trying to help, and in case you haven't noticed, by being the person that he is, he has helped advance the Philippine comic book industry further than a lot of his detractors ever have despite their supposed tenure. So if you find yourself using only your credentials, your past as an excuse to question the man's integrity, then get a fucking clue, and back off from Elbert. If you can't take the heat, then get out of the kitchen. If you ain't down with that, then I've got two words for ya.

Screw you.

Small Weekend Wonders...

.:He Never Learns...:.

People seem to fail to realize that you will always miss the shots you never take. When people question the wisdom of doing something or taking a risk, the heart of the matter is that people are actually failing to realize that it's a self-fulfilling prophecy when you don't even try or condemn an effort to failure from the get-go.

There are many schools of thought to dealing with relationships of any ilk, and one of the most prominent would have to be the belief in waiting for “the one” and that everyone is destined to find that so-called “one”. While this is all good and interesting, it still boils down to the fact that quite frankly, when one merely waits, they are liable to let a lot of people pass them by. People who could've been that “one”.

Will the universe utterly conspire to work in your favor and get you with that person? Will destiny bring you together no matter what the odds may be? If that were true then, why is there a need for courtship or getting to know others? If that were true then, why would one have several other relationships before finding the “one”? Is that not a sign that in a world filled with failed relationships and heartbreaks, that destiny doesn't really quite work that way?

At some point, one has to realize that life is nowhere nearly as simple as allowing something so good, something real, to drop on the lap. Such passiveness flies in the face of the free will the human being has been given.

It's disappointing, really, but at the end of the day, it's just another heartbreak. You tend to get used to that after a while.

Maybe someday, there won't be a heart to wear on Marcelle's sleeve any longer.

.:Genuine Surprises:.

So I was in Eastwood, hanging out with Estelle, ND, and a new friend, Jay, who's one of 'Elle's old friends who's also into debating.

It was really fun, to say the least, because this came after a mini road trip with Mang Ted as I redeemed my money order, and then had a bit of fun at the arcade in UM.

Nonetheless, things were going very well, and then, a genuine surprise suddenly appeared right before my very eyes as I was seated with them in Seattle's Best.

Camy, as in Camy Francisco, showed up outside the window and waved at me.

So I asked her to come inside so I could introduce her to everyone, and lo and behold, she hit it off with everyone right away.

It was definitely a unique experience, as quite honestly, I've never spoken to her for as long as I have that evening, and she was a genuinely cool person. One can only hope she does well with the interview she's been meaning to secure for herself...

Anyways, we all really just enjoyed each other's company, as it turned out that Camy was in the area because she was keen on watching Up Dharma Down. It was definitely a pretty eventful night, as Camy instantly gelled with ND and Estelle, which I found to be really cool.

.:Hanging Out:.

My wholehearted thanks to Estelle for keeping me company yesterday. Watching “The Shining” with you and Tita Toots was loads of fun, and thanks for being patient enough while I racked up fifteen wins at Marvel Vs. Capcom 2, and for being so nice to Mr. Ben Ting while we talked in his shop in Shoppesville.

This is exactly why I'm so grateful for my Bessie... =)

.:Ninth Place?:.

When the cutoff is the top eight, it gets incredibly frustrating when you're the ninth place. Oh, well. Life goes on. Hahahahaha...

.:A Magician's Secret I'm Willing To Reveal:.

One of the coolest thing about being a magician is that if you want to, you can use the fact that you're performing magic as an excuse to hold a girl's hand for as long as you want.

It's one of the simple pluses of being a magician, though I wouldn't really know, since I'm not one myself...

I'm sure a certain friend of mine named Anne gets the picture... hahaha.

Wheeee!!!

.:Highly Recommended:.

While I won't review it until after a second viewing, I highly encourage people to watch “The Departed”, which is a very good movie. Don't let the fact that Leo DiCaprio in the movie get in the way. This movie is not fluff at all. It's very good, very brilliant, and very gripping.

.:The Comic Book Conundrum:.

It's a Friday, and it's my first day of my 3-week long leave. That being said, I wanted to tag along with Elbert so I could see how different his workshop for grade school kids would be from his workshop for high school girls. The comic art workshop was going to be in Assumption San Lorenzo for the high school alternative class program.

So anyways, we took a cab to get there, and one thing I really noticed was how El really doesn't carry any preparatory materials, and was perfectly prepared to make do with whatever he ends up being dealt with, though I have yet to see what he can actually do about being handed nothing but a blackboard and chalk. One of the first things he did was add “hanky panky” to the whiteboard's “WFTD”, which I misread as “WTFD”. He even went ahead and gave the ruddy thing a working definition.

Once we got there, we hung around the lounge just to grab a bite, then headed out to the computer room where the art workshop was going to be. El's been here before, but I pretty much had no idea what to expect, truth be told. Soon enough, the students started filing in, and once El started asking them why they were even there, it was becoming clear that most of them were there just because they ran out of alternatives. Regardless, it was an hour and a half to kill, and Elbert started talking about what defines a comic book, and then the five basic tools needed to create a comic book: the page, the panel, the layout, the words, and the images.

Throughout, I was introduced as Mr. Kel Fabie, and used for a lot of Elbert's examples. He was mainly ragging on my hair, but it's all good. After a while, it was my turn to speak, and I opened with a magic trick that I somehow managed to segue into foresight, which I explained was a necessity for being a comics book writer who doesn't illustrate.

Afterwards, we were winding down and the girls started asking us about anime. They practically screamed in delight whenever Elbert or I would stamp our “seal of approval” on this or that series, and they were amused with the impressions I did of Master Jeremiah and Toguro. Talk about Chii and Chobits also happened, as well as GTO. It was definitely funny how all the students just went all fangirly in a blink of an eye.

We then had wonderful lunch at the lounge, and I saw Peppy's sister. Took a while before it registered to me that it was Peppy, but there. It was all good, regardless, and Elbert and I relaxed a bit in Greenhills before we headed back out to Makati, this time for Jamie's grandfather's ninth-day memorial service.

Amid the lechon baka, El, Jamie, and I had interesting discussions, and El tried pimping out Jamie's sister to me, who was already a lawyer. I'm not quite sure if I'm her type, but whaddaheck. I'm not really too gung-ho on looking or anything for anyone. I'm just really coasting along at this point.

We capped the day off with desert at Flaming Wings for the third straight day at the exact same table with April, and we discovered much to our delight just how awesome the Wicked Oreos desert offered by Flaming Wings turned out to be.

.:Saturday's Birthday Blast:.

Well, it was my grandmother's birthday, so we celebrated at Sumo San, where we had a sumptuous lunch, and it was then followed by me meeting up with Estelle and JP because, unless I was mistaken, I was depressed at the time for some reason or some other. In any case, we then ended up dropping by my dentist, before we all headed out to kidnap Elbert and Debbie to then head off to Estelle's watch just to watch “Shutter” and “Love's Concerte”. The funny thing is that Elbert really had scary dreams about “Shutter” after the movie, including him dreaming one of his exes was chasing him after he threw her off when it turned out she was perched atop his shoulders. Just when he awoke from the dream as her hands approached his face, he turned to me, and I turned around in my sleep at that very moment and my hands landed in front of his face, which scared him to the point of tears. Haha.

Love's Concerte still has an effect on me. By the time she was turning the clock back, I just froze there, as I was really gripped by that scene.

This was followed up by the news that I actually sang Michael Learns To Rock in my sleep, and Elsie was telling me to shut up while she was also asleep. This is weird... really weird.

Anyways, that was Saturday in a nutshell. It was a relatively cheap affair, since we were actually supposed to watch Twilight Dancers, but instead, we went ahead and watched DVD's at Estelle's place instead.

.:Sunday Awesomeness:.

I was really keen on watching “Don_Q”, a contemporary adaptation of the Don Quixote play by PETA, and ended up going with El and 'Elle to the play. Well, what else is new, right? In any case, it was still all good since I really enjoyed the play and the stylized techniques they employed to underscore the fact that you were entering a video game world ala Ragnarok, and the characters were portrayed real well. Eric Quizon and Eugene Domingo played Don_Q's parents, albeit only via pre-recorded spiels shown on the white screens. It was pretty cool, really

The storyline was very allegorical while at the same time grounded in reality. At the same time, the characters, in spite of the fact that they were centuries removed from the setting of the original Don Quixote, still resonated in its own way the essence of the original. It may take some looking, but there are still windmills in his mind that Don_Q had to fight against, and the play really underscored it.

Of course, Elbert and 'Elle noticed that I wasn't entirely watching just the play, as on the floor where the actors were, a small section of the audience was actually seated in the center, and there was someone who caught my eye. So after intermission, I went down, got to know her and her friends, then ended up seated with them. Elbert and 'Elle were still on the second floor, and they were with 'Elle's teacher, who turned out to be the teacher of the students I was seated with.

Anyways, her name is Willow, and while I haven't really heard from her ever since, you have to admit that her name is a very pretty name.

After the play, I ended up running into Toby from Radio 1, and we just caught up with each other, really. It turned out that Elbert also knew him, and the three of us talked shop for the most part. It turned out to be interesting, although we have to wait and see what happens afterwards. For now, I guess you might say that it's been a very good Sunday that got me to thinking and got me smiling, if only for a while.

.:Monday Blahs:.

I forgot my keys when I got to my condo, so I ended up sleeping at the station instead. I was fairly tired, but afterwards, I met up with Estelle to hopefully get my money from the post office Moneygram center, which didn't turn out too well as we kidnapped Elbert first, and it was pretty funny when we did, regardless.

Made a new acquaintance today. His name's Neil, and he seemed like a quiet guy. We got to the post office too late, but then I was starving already and we headed out to President's for a good meal that was highlighted by roast duck, fried squid, and green mango shake. It was real awesome hearing about how President's used to look like before it became a restaurant, and it was even more fun gaining insights about Chinese culture from the way Elbert talked.

I guess when you are born to a culture that ensures your future whether or not you want that future, it would seem petty when I get petulant over not getting my way or over how people don't become more liberal-minded or at least even-keeled as I tend to be. It's really just a thought, but you tend to come up with some valid insights when you're just thinking out loud.

It was nice seeing the fountain by the post office, though. It seems like it'd be the perfect setting to have a music video, where someone would start dancing, and then magically, everyone in the venue knows the steps and they all go and dance along and stuff. It's a bit amusing, to be honest. Then, the fight scene of the said music video would be held at President's, which looks like a perfect place to have a fight scene in...

I Had Such An Eventful Weekend...

... unfortunately, I'm too tired to do my blogging.

It's been an eventful weekend, and one can only hope that I'd find the time to spill all the details when I finally find the time to piece them together...

I watched a few movies, hung out with friends, had a fun time at Assumption San Lorenzo, watched a play, and successfully got to know this certain person with a super-pretty name... I have to admit, having a name like "Willow" would never fail to get my attention.

Ah, well. Let's play all of this by ear, then...

There You Go...

.:Film Review: First Day High:.

First Day High
It's a mystery.

This movie has so many things going for it, and it's only limited by the quality of actors they had, to be honest.

“First Day High” follows the lives of five students in freshman college, each portraying an archetype established in the Rexona commercials. We have Nathan (Jason Abalos), Nice Guy High; Gael (Geoff Eigenmann), Rebel High; Precious (Maja Salvador), Sosy High; MJ2 (Gerald Anderson), MVP High; and Indi (Kim Chiu), Brainy High.

One month into the schoolyear, during the first game between FDHU and Madison, the FDHU players, for some weird reason, just acted crazy, and it turns out that it was because the water the players drank was contaminated. The subsequent investigation leads to a very interesting, kitsch/pastiche, campy at times, sappy at times, but overall enjoyable, romp into five kids trying to find themselves in the middle of song and dance numbers, tears, laughs, and spills.

Making my day was the fact that the original Rexona commercial cast members (Though I didn't see Sosy High anywhere, sadly.) were there, and Patty was't kidding when she said she didn't have that much of a role. Still, she had a lot more lines than the original Nice Guy High had, which was... errmmm... one (“Nathan!”).

I won't spoil the story at this point, but what I really liked was how well the archetypes and the very hokey color-coding of students worked to the movie's advantage. The song numbers were very amusing, and the loveteam of Gerald and Kim, as well as the Jason and Maja undertones worked just well, while Geoff's character of Gael really kept the movie from being overtly sappy and too sweet for its own good.

The movie played stereotypes very well, and very wittily. Despite being the “sosy” types, Pre's faction, while a bit annoying to the ears, were still clearly a good-hearted bunch, and it kind of made you feel less antagonistic of them and more forgiving of their annoying speech patterns. Gael's rebellious streak was tempered by his artistic tendencies, and Nathan's being nice was precisely what gave a lot of spice to the movie in the first place, especially since he was doing most of the exposition for the movies.

The adults in the film also played their roles well. Cherry Pie Picache played the estranged wife and loving mother to Indi; Michael De Mesa played the father who wanted to live through his son, Gael; Gardo Versoza played the noveau rich father with a heart of gold to Pre; and of course, Bembol Roco played the no-nonsense detective who tried to piece together what happened in the basketball water contamination incident.

One of the biggest shortcomings/sources of amusement of the movie though was the fact that the lead loveteam, Gerald and Kim, both had to work through stilted speech, as Gerald had his Amboy accent, while Kim had her Cebuana Chinese accent, which really resulted in one of the most awkward-sounding onscreen arguments I've ever heard, but the movie's self-awareness and fourth-wall breaking with the inside jokes when it came to subtle Rexona references more than made up for this. If anything, I found the stilted speech rather cute, but I would be less forgiving of such in future film involving them. Yes, I find Kim Chiu hot, but that's beside the point. 'Sides, I personally prefer a certain other Brainy High person...

And, err... well, Kim sounded too much like Elsie, Elbert's sister. They really really sound alike.

I found it very refreshing as well that the movie used product placement very sparingly. Not a single Rexona bottle was in view, and the most they would do was talk about confidence and raise their arms. When you contrast that to the sheer commercialism of Kris Aquino's movies, you realize that was an amazing practice of restraint...

In any case, don't let anyone tell you that the movie was bad fool you. Quite sadly, a lot of people just can't see beyond the fact that it's a Filipino movie and are quick to dismiss it as fluff. To be frank, if you walked into the movie expecting to find the deeper meaning of life, then you walked in for the wrong reasons.

Witty writing, non-linear storytelling, healthy doses of self-awareness, catchy songs, brilliant motifs, and very entertaining character developments. With all of these going for First Day High, along with the fact that my uncle was one of the guys who put the whole movie together, FDH was definitely a great movie worth catching.

“Fun” Evaluation: A
“Critical” Evaluation: A-

.:Misplaced Nationalism:.

I've said it before that quite frankly, I am no big fan of the overtly commercialized Manny Pacquiao, but I am not surprised nor am I resentful of the people who are fans.

I know a lot of Pacquiao fans who believe that they are being patriotic simply by declaring their support for the boxer. They assume that they become nationalistic by doing a little “rah-rah Pacquiao” ditty, and on first sight, it does seem to be so. They're proud when he wins, devastated when he loses, and verbally assault the judges when they feel differently about how the fight should've turned out.

At the end of the day though, are they really being nationalistic? Or is that just one facet of them and the rest of their personality would rapidly fly in the face of their claims at being so?

While I will not point an accusing finger at a friend of mine over this, I recently saw that there have been a lot of people I knew who were wont to bash a movie solely on the basis of it being a Filipino movie. Or bash a song solely on the basis of it being a Filipino song. You don't have to like Hale, but I knew they actually lost some fans when it turned out they were a local bad and not the latest U.S. rock act to hit the country.

It's inane and it's retarded. One moment you have people feigning Filipino pride in cheering Manny Pacquiao on, the next, you have them turning their noses up to stellar films like “Ang Pagdadalaga Ni Maximo Oliveros”, or coming into “First Day High” and expecting nothing short but a movie that will give them the meaning of life. In the same breath, they will praise the brilliance of “The Aviator”, and get the tongue-in-cheek pastiche that “Snakes on a Plane” was supposed to be, while utterly missing those very same qualities in the aforementioned Filipino films.

Why is that? Because the movies were bad?

Because the movies had shoddy production values?

Because the actors couldn't act their way out of a paper bag?

Or was it solely because it was a local movie?

My uncle Raymund helped produce First Day High and easy as it may have been for me to just go and ask him for free tickets, I watched the movie with friends. Twice. I love the movie, and I wouldn't hesitate watching it a third time if someone wanted to MST3K it with me for another go.

I have a personal stake in the movie, given how uncle Raymund happens to be my favorite uncle.

I would harp on FDH as a movie more than any other film right now mainly because I've heard too many people who watched the movie and missed out on the parody and took it seriously. It's like punching Dave Chapelle out for saying stuff offensive to blacks, or calling out Margaret Cho for her Asian slurs. It was self-aware, self-referential, and maybe the acting of the lead stars wasn't the best, but the script was tight and had lots of heart.

But I digress. I think what I'm trying to drive home is the plain and simple fact that after all has been said and done, “Filipino pride” does not solely consist of rooting on a Manny Pacquiao, or heaven forbid, a Dave Batista. Filipino pride is a way of life, and it's learning to look at all things, not just those made in the Philippines, with more discerning eyes, listening to all things, not just those made in the Philippines, with more meticulous ears.

.:Hoping On Empty:.

One of the best lines in “First Day High” came from the last exchange between Indi (Kim Chiu) and her mom (Cherry Pie Picache)... I'll try to paraphrase the line, if I can.

Indi: Ma, bakit mo ba mahal si Papa?

Mom: Kasi, minsan, dumarating sa buhay natin, na ibibigay natin ang ating sarili at ang ating lahat, kahit hindi natin alam kung ano ang maasahan nating bumalik.

And I think about that, and I realize why I felt I could relate to Ms. Brainy High the most, and only to Mr. Nice Guy High the next...

Nat-Nat, in the film was the nice guy who tried to help out his friends but ended up bungling things up miserably. He's the guy with the Atlas complex, as he tried to take on all their problems while ignoring his own. In fact, to my recollection, the part of his lyrics in the song “Ayan Kasi, Ayan Tuloy” was...

Bakit ganito?
Paano nangyari ito?
I was so nice
I forgot about myself
Ayan kasi, ayan tuloy...

And I know, at times, I'm guilty of that. In fact, at the risk of coming off as sadistic, I am more at home with helping friends deal with their problems than I am at dealing with mine, because in helping them out, not only do I make them feel better, but for a fleeting moment, my problems are shelved as I put their concerns to the forefront.

But then, I remember that time when I wished I had access to Lacuna Industries, the way Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet did in “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”, and I realize why I related to Indi the most...

You see, her story arc involved her not working out too well with the guy she liked, mainly because he was torn between his duty to the school team and their budding relationship. I put a lot of weight in that relation, because it truly hits home... how one would be torn between one's duty and responsibility with what one truly feels, and how one could possibly turn off all feelings and emotions in order to do what they feel they should be doing instead of what they want to be doing...

I understand that. It doesn't mean it hurts any less.

And there goes Indi, who, as a means of coping, attempted to invent an anti-love potion that would allow her to stop loving him, only to find out that all it induced were side effects (Poor bunny! That was animal testing! Meeeeeaaaannnn!!!)...

... and again, she had a killer line...

Indi: Apparently, hindi lahat ng bagay, may formula.

There's no formula to curing heartbreak, or formula to hoping on empty. Or hoping for someone to come around.

All one can do is to deal with it, and to live with it. And to recall that no matter what, there are still other facets of life that will give one cause for joy, and to not let that one stinging aspect of one's being override the remaining good there is in everything else.

But then, it's true. There comes a point in one's life where you would just give and give and hope on nothing but empty words.

It is painful. It is wretched. But at the end of the day... it is worth it.

It always will be, if you're being true to yourself.

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have bad times together than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart.

Luther Vandross, I'd Rather

.:Counting Your Eggs Before Your Chickens Hatch:.

A few months ago, an editorial from the Guidon by Sports Editor Gerald Santos came out, which essentially all but declared that the ADMU Blue Eagles will win the championship this UAAP season, and lamented on how “empty” such a victory would be since the so-called archrivals, DLSU, weren't there to validate it.

And now, in what was no doubt a nail-biter of a game, the UST Growling Tigers pulled what is viewed by some to be a huge upset, akin to how the Phoenix Suns pulled out of a 3-1 hole in the playoffs against the Lakers last season, or how the supposedly “unbeatable” lineup of Kobe, Shaq, Payton, Malone, and Fisher for the Lakers during a couple of seasons or so prior were unable to get the job done.

No doubt, the Blue Eagles gave their all, and I would be loathe to take that much away from them. That is not the point of this long-delayed formal reply to the Guidon editorial in question, after all. Rather, the point is that in light of such an “upset” defeat, journalists of the stature of Guidon should be far more discreet than to count their chickens before their eggs hatch.

Throughout the season, I was personally rooting on the N.U. Bulldogs, and while they did only marginally better this season, I had no problems whatsoever if it turned out that the Blue Eagles did win the championship. Whether or not the Green Archers were there to “validate” such a victory, it would've been a victory nonetheless, but I was only going to celebrate it when and if it actually happened, not long before the first jump ball of the season took place.

Quite frankly, was this so-called Blue-Green Symbiosis purported by Mr. Santos even of merit? Of the five championships that DLSU won in the last six or seven years, how many of them were against ADMU in the finals? To my recollection, only one.

So really now, did DLSU need ADMU to “validate” their championships? Why would “the” Ateneo even need to bolster its own image atop another school's, when it is most certainly capable of doing it on its own merits?


I am obviously not the most ADMU-centric alumnus that this institution has to offer, but I would certainly give my congratulations if, when, and to whom they are due. This was UST's season, no matter how many times we claim it to have been an upset, or tsamba, or blame Typhoon Milenyo for ruining our momentum. This takes nothing away from our players, either.

This ending, however, takes away a lot from the credibility of the sports editor for trumpeting an Ateneo victory even before the season began. This ending would be a lesson in humility and discretion to all of us who echoed his sentiments as if there were only two teams in the entirety of the UAAP.

One can only hope that more judicious and less arbitrary opinions can be thrown about in editorials in the Guidon in the future. If there should at least be one thing that we may (hope to) continue to fairly request of the Guidon outside of relevance, then integrity would have to be it.

Thank You, All...

... To all the people who greeted me the past couple of days, thank you, everyone.

Whether or not you did show up for the celebration in the dark last night, the mere fact that you considered showing up and that you remembered it was my birthday is more than enough for me.

I thank my friends for ruining my plans of making this birthday to be the worst birthday of my life. I don't think there ever was a time where I was more grateful for friends wrecking my plans now, more than ever.