It's Been A Long Time...

.:I Understand...:.

... more than ever, that there needs to be a foundation for you to be worth fighting for.

Initial attraction is rarely, if ever, enough to make someone just say "to Hades with the risks" and fight for you tooth and nail. There has to be more than that. They have to see you as worth it not just because of what you initially seem to be, but with who they think you really are.

It's not an issue of whether or not you are truly worth fighting for.

It's an issue of whether or not they know you well enough to even determine for themselves what the deal is.

Someday, I hope to find someone who wouldn't just be someone I could love and treasure.

Someday, I hope to find someone who would take the time out to know for herself if I truly am worth fighting for.

Otherwise, I guess there really is no point for me to just continue pining on empty when one would rather curtail it when they think of me all the time, or when they feel the slightest bit of desire to want to be with me when the going is bad.

Wouldn't it normally be taken as a good thing if you knew someone was willing to cheer you up when you've been having a bad day? Wouldn't it be normally taken as a good thing that thinking of someone makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside?

But it's sad, because even after all that, you're still not worth fighting for.

And maybe, just maybe, you never were, and you just refused to recognize it.

.:Bonding With Friends...:.

Had a grand time with Debbie and Camz and Exstelle at Cubao, where we rediscovered our childhood by going to Fiesta Carnival. I rode a couple of rides, the most terrifying (and painful!) being the one that looked like a massive spinning disc that just tossed you around and almost compacted my spine, even.

Debbie was particularly surprised when she found out that I already do magic, and really loved the routine, even if I mainly did card magic, which isn't really my strongest suit. I spent the night over at her place, and saw Dominique after a while. It was pretty cool, all things considered.

A few days later, I dropped by Elbert's place after a long time, and that was really great. It's pretty nice hanging out with him and Estelle, although of course...

...

...

... I digress.

.:Thanks!:.

A friend gave me a call to cheer me up because I texted her that I was so stressed with this week's playlist requirement. Lo and behold, they really want us to do this whole mess for no more than two hours, and that's just not going to be a mean feat, to say the least...

In any case, I'm very grateful to Row for having been there for me lately. It's been an amazing two months of just reconnecting with you, and I'm hoping that things just continue to get better and better. For now, all I have on my side is hope.

.:A Photo Shoot...:.

Whoah. Looks like I'll be showing up for Seventeen Magazine in line with the fact that I'm going to be featured as one of those "freelance guys" you always hear about, except they're going to focus on the fact that I'm actually a magician.

They took pictures of me while I had my cards fanned out.

And ONLY with my cards fanned out.

No, I'm just kidding, really. Seriously speaking, I'm just really happy about it because the girl who photographed me actually has a bar, and I know I can do magic in bars with no problems whatsoever. Just going from table to table shouldn't be a problem for me, as I have a lot of good magic standbys to put to use.

This is a good start lined up for the coming year. Let's hope I can follow up on it well enough, because while I was there with Tata and Monica from Summit, I really gave them a demonstration of a few good effects I've been putting to good use. I did the Lightning Box, I did Kaos, I did Stigmata, and I did the Ultimate Transpo, which is quickly becoming a personal favorite of mine already. It's quick, simple, and a very effective magic trick for impromptu.