Showing posts with label phailippines. Show all posts
Showing posts with label phailippines. Show all posts

Friday, June 20, 2014

Project 52 2014 (25/52): King Of Anything

.:Project 52 2014 (25/52): King Of Anything:.



Keep drinkin' coffee...

Why is it that when these blowhard politicians get all caught up in their web of lies, suddenly they're the "victims?" And yet life goes on for them, even while incarcerated. Look at Bong Revilla, telling everyone how ready he is to go to jail, yet immediately petitioning for request of detention center after his bid for house arrest didn't quite pan out? How about Senator Enrile, who is asking for bail or something just because he's 90 years old? These people don't know how to handle the consequences of what they've done. At all.

And who pays for this folly? We, the people, do. When they bring a camera crew to cover their every move and hopefully reuse the footage when they run for president in 2016, we have this sinking feeling that the money to pay for all that bullsh!t came from us.

Stare me down across the table while I look outside...

Yet somehow, when we, the common people, speak out against these travesties, somehow, we are "oppressing" them. How the Hades do you expect to "oppress" people worth 169 million pesos, pray tell? It's ridiculous, and the way they drag God into everything they talk about has become so tiresome. That sh!t never made Mayor Sanchez any less a murderer and rapist, did it? So quit playing that card because even Satan himself knew how to quote himself some scripture.

So I just glare. And roll my eyes. But if I rolled my eyes any harder, I might end up looking at the back of my skull.

Or become the Undertaker.


So many things I'd say if  only I were able but I just keep quiet...

And you think I'm already being vocal as it stands? Well, you'd be surprised, because there is so much more that remains unsaid when it comes to these fatcat politicians who think they're all that. One can't help but be appalled at the sheer nerve they have, doing what they do, but then, does it really surprise anyone anymonre?

And count the cars that pass by...

That's all I could do, really, because it boggles my mind how the good Senators have managed to make this issue about them, instead of the f#$%ng 10 Billion Pesos that have been stolen from this nation's coffers. You know why you're being arrested, right? If you really cared about this country, that's what you should be railing against, not the fact that you don't have air conditioning in your goddamned jail cell, which you totally shouldn't have, by the way.

I realize SJW's use "check your privilege" all the time when it comes to racial, gender, or sexual issues, but when it comes to economic issues, these well-to-do senators really have to check their privilege, because a combined income of almost 400 Million Pesos between Senators Revilla and Estrada alone should seriously qualify as being "privileged."

You've got opinions, man, we're all entitled to 'em, but I never asked...

And so these so-called leaders feel oppressed and maltreated because they get singled out for doing something countless other politicians no doubt are doing, too. Here's a secret: saying other people are doing it too doesn't make you innocent of the act. It just meant you weren't alone. Nobody's saying you were alone, and only your political enemies want it that way. But we, the people? We want every single one of you to pay through the nose for taking our money and turning it into your own personal bank account.

So feel free to think you're being oppressed, but we don't care. Because we couldn't oppress you even if we tried.

Here. Play the world's smallest violin yourself. I don't have the energy.


So let me thank you for your time, and try to not waste any more of mine...

Not just time, but money, too. Stop wasting our money with your stupid press conferences, your press coverages, your trumped up entourage, all paid for on our dime, just because you think you're above the common folk.

I can bet you that if I ever go to jail, guilty or innocent, I won't be getting that kind of media coverage, I wouldn't have supporters fighting tooth and nail to keep me out of jail, nor would I even have the temerity much less the opportunity to ask for air conditioning in my jail cell.

Get out of here fast...

And don't come back. But leave your money at the door, because that's our money right there.

I hate to break it to you, babe, but I'm not drowning. There's no one here to save...

The Filipino people doesn't need saving from the likes of you. We could have had savings, in fact, if you didn't take them from us and spent them on yourself, you dolts. We're fine counting on ourselves, because it didn't take too long for us to realize that we couldn't count on you for anything at all.

So stop invoking God as if He gave you the right to be a self-appointed martyr. The only altar you're sacrificing yourself at is your own.

Every single time you use His name in vain, He facepalms.


Who cares if you disagree? You are not me. Who made you king of anything?

You may have been elected by the people, but that doesn't put you above the people. Not in the least. For you to live in that kind of opulence while your constituents are starving to death, wondering where their next meal is going to come from is a shame that is telling. Because that money came from your constituents. You took it from them in the implicit promise that they will see the fruits of that money returned unto them, yet here we all are, putting up with monster traffic jams, a continuous problem with peace and order, and no clear solution in sight.

So don't tell us about how it's the implementing body's fault that you gave your pork barrel money to a bogus NGO. At best, you are idiots who should never have been trusted with our money in the first place. Why are you even still in power, then?

So you dare tell me who to be, who died and made you king of anything?

If anyone should die to make you king of anything, it should be you. Angelo Reyes got it right. You can do it!

Friday, June 13, 2014

Project 52 2014 (24/52): Salamat, Kaibigan

.:Project 52 2014 (24/52): Salamat, Kaibigan:.



Salamat sa inyong pagmamahal…

Who doesn’t love Bong Revilla? Who doesn’t love how much effort he clearly puts into helping run this country while still juggling a movie career. With nearly 20 million people who have voted him into power, it’s very clear that there’s a lot of love to go around for Bong Revilla. Just ask Rufa Mae Qu… I mean, Lani Mercado.

Bong Revilla is love, ladies and gentlemen. Don’t get any of that twisted.

Pictured: Love.


Sa tiwala, pananalig, at dasal…

Millions of people believe in Bong Revilla. They trust him with their life. They pray for him to make it through this latest challenge facing him. And we certainly have to hope nothing but the best for him, right? That’s why he needs our prayers now, more than ever. Surely, God will listen to the supplications of a man who is truly beleaguered and at the lowest of the low, who just happens to have a net worth of 169 million Pesos.

Yes, please pray for this man. Pray for him because he is clearly in need of so much help and pity.

Ang pagsubok sa ‘ting buhay ay hindi magtatagal…

Of course not. Trials never last. If you’re a person born to a debilitating genetic disease with no cure for it, that trial certainly won’t last, right? Such brilliance! Such perspective! Only from the lofty heights of being privileged does someone get to say that tough times never last, so it’s good to know exactly where our beloved Senator Revilla is coming from.

You too, can get past this. All you need to do is... BONG-LIEVE!


Katotohanan lilitaw, sa gabay ng Maykapal…

Has anyone actually bothered asking God if he likes having his named dragged into these speeches? He has never responded and they just assume He’s totally cool with it? Okay. Carry on, then, Senator Revilla!

Kailanman ay ‘di nang-iiwan.

He has certainly never left anyone behind. After all, he’s still with his wife after all those affairs years, right? Truly, Senator Revilla is a paragon of all that is good and righteous, as he suffers through tempest after tempest of accusations. After all, it makes all the sense in the world that he earned all his money through hard work and dedication! It’s not like every single whistleblower is insisting that he had a hand in stealing 10 Billion of our money, right? So no, just like a piece of crap you keep flushing but keeps coming back, he’s not leaving us anytime soon.

Sumama, nanalig sa anumang laban…

Yes, let’s keep praying for Bong Revilla, everyone! Because the more we pray, the less we could do other things with our time, like actually put him and his kind on trial. So just keep on praying, keep on praying, and keep on praying, lest you actually try to get some sh!t done instead, which would really not help Bong Revilla get away with anything.

Pictured: Senator Bong Revilla, fighting. For us.


Ngayon ang buhay ko ay pilit dinudungisan…

It’s all mudslinging, ladies and gentlemen. When a country like ours continues being ridiculously poor while people like Janet Napoles and Pogi, Tanda, and Sexy keep getting richer and richer, any suspicious glances cast their way is merely mudslinging. And leave us not forget those other people who are in league with them who just don’t happen to be their political allies, too. Sullying their name? Just more mudslinging and destabilization, so let’s all just keep praying and doing exactly jacksh!t about it, because that’s for the best, right?

Let’s not let them smear the names of these good men, any longer. Let’s just… well, pray some more.

Ngunit ‘di ako papayag, hantungan may’ kamatayan…

It’s amazing how Senator Revilla’s privilege speech really encompassed the man’s bravery. He faced everything coming his way, and freaking held onto power. Resignation? Pah! That’s beneath a man of Senator Revilla’s stature. He will hold onto that power because by jove, he’s a Revilla, and much in the same way it takes Gutz to be a Gutierrez, it takes Evil to be a Revilla. Does that make much sense? No, no it doesn’t, but is it that much worse than the entirety of the privilege speech. Just pity the man! Can’t you not feel sympathy for what he goes through, and the dignity by which he conducts himself in the face of all that?

Pictured: Dignity.


Salamat, mga kaibigan…

No. Thank you, dear Senator. Thank you for taking on the cares and woes of this country and becoming a martyr for the truth to come out. Thank you for helping us by proposing the laws like… err… ummm… for praying for us! Yeah, that works. Thanks for praying for us, dear Senator! I’m sure prayers in the Senate were totally more powerful than prayers made in your movie sets. Or something.

Kailanman ay ‘di malilimutan…

We’ll never forget you either, o great, noble leader. Truly, you have been an outstanding inspiration to all of us, and you will always be an indelible part of our history. The history of this nation’s ridiculous compulsion to put any showbiz personality into power just because they know your name and nothing more.

Kung ito man ang kapalaran, nananalig pa rin sa katotohanan…

You really can’t get enough of praying, can’t you? That’s why we love you, dear Senator. It’s beautiful how you would take the time out to even go to the Holy Land itself to pray for guidance. We wish we had that kind of money, you know. To go to the Holy Land, too. But we kinda have bills to pay and mouths to feed, but it’s okay! We’re sure not a single cent you spent on that trip was illicitly taken from the taxes we pay regularly.

Salamat, mga kaibigan, kayo ang aking tanging sandigan…

Huh? I thought you said God was your foundation? Several times in several speeches, even! Suddenly, it’s us! Such magnanimity! To elevate us to the level of God, it’s just, it’s just… mind-blowing!

Pagmamahal niyo ang nagbibigay kalakasan…

If our love strengthens you, then you truly are unbeatable. Nothing, not even the facts, can get in the way!

Habang kayo ay nariyan, lagi lamang tatandaan…

Wait for it, wait for it…

Ikaw ako, ako ikaw, magkaibigan…

Drop the mic, Bong. Drop the mic.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Project 52 (22/52): On Former Chief Justice Corona (And Why I Didn't Give Much Of a Damn)

.:Project 52 (22/52): On Former Chief Justice Corona (And Why I Didn't Give Much Of a Damn):.


Professor X and Oracle were not amused.

It's over! He's now Former Chief Justice Corona! Woo-hoo! Let us party in the streets and celebrate this triumph of justice over evil and deception! This nation will finally become great again! Next, we solve poverty!

Wait. That isn't exactly happening anytime soon, is it? But at least, we get to send this "Thief Justice" to jail for being the scoundrel and the scalawag that he is! Hooray! Salutations to everyone! Cheerio!

Hold on. That's not happening, either. In fact, nobody's suing him for anything. He lost his position as Chief Justice, but his money, legit or ill-gotten as it may be, no longer has to fall under scrutiny anymore. So what was that all about?

Sure, some might say that the fact that we finished an impeachment trial for the first time in this nation's history is a big deal in and by itself. And to a large extent, it is. But just because a kid completes his first ever school project doesn't mean it's going to be a good one. The trial was littered with procedural errors, questionable sources of evidence, and a host of other issues. If this were a criminal or civil trial, the whole thing would've been declared a mistrial.

And like we all realized, especially with Noynoy conveniently ignoring one of his campaign promises, Corona's conviction doesn't bring about anything, except maybe a window of hope that the Senate would get around to passing the RH Bill or the Freedom of Information Act, two laws that would have far more immediate impacts on this nation than the ouster of one man who was merely a pawn in a political chessboard where this country's citizens are mere bystanders and spectators, rather than actual, meaningful players.

In the barbershop of life, we are the tambays looking on as two players jostle for victory in the dama board that is our nation. We don't really have much of a say no matter how much we try to coach either side.

It was, in the grand scheme of things, a monumental waste of time. Just like the whole overblown trial Joseph Estrada got, which resulted in him being found guilty then immediately being given a presidential pardon. Needless to say, that was the culmination of taxpayers' money at work: a criminal convicted of plunder is let go, and none of his assets were even sequestered for return to the government. Is that justice?

Now, we remove the highest magistrate of the land and let him go quietly into private life without so much as checking if the money he does have, the money he conveniently didn't declare as part of his net worth, is actually ill-gotten or not? Sure, it's a political exercise, but did it have to stop at being that, when we could have done something far more conclusive? Something that sends a message other than "prosecutors can succeed despite themselves, so long as it's politically beneficial to throw someone other than the bus"?

Where do we go from here, then? And no, I don't mean Noynoy going out on another date with Grace Lee or something. We went through the motions of this trial, we removed Corona from power, and yet are we any closer to recovering the wealth we insist GMA accumulated since 2001? Hades, we haven't even recovered the money from the Marcoses yet!

It was a mockery of a process, because it did so much yet accomplished so little. The senators did their jobs to the best of their abilities, but clearly, it was a job that wasn't anywhere nearly as important as other important issues of the day that, if resolved, would immediately affect lives.

We've gotten to a point where discussing anything else is met with a real opportunity cost. Dilly-dallying on these issues would only serve to further this problem, and that is certainly alarming, to put it mildly.

So yeah, we've had our fill of jokes, armchair experts, and everything else in between. Despite that, after everything has been said and done, now, we have to get down to business. Now, we have more important things to do.

CJ Corona wishes to be left alone, after losing his position, yet still holding $2.4 Million and 80 Million pesos in his bank accounts. Who won here? Who lost here?

Clearly, the Filipino nation was the loser again, because running after the Coronas, the Arroyos, and the Marcoses hasn't really gotten us back any of the money we insist was stolen from our coffers, and we just keep putting them in power, regardless.

It's time we focused our attention on the things that would directly affect us, and for the better.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

On Planks And Weddings: My POV On Best Of Anime 2011

.:Best Of Anime 2011 Recap!:.


The magnetic stage proved to be metal man's undoing.

Hosting Best Of Anime 2011 was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had, and I don't even know where to begin to tell you about how much fun I had.

Well, I guess I could begin by mentioning that I probably won't be giving a full-blown recap of who the winners were and all of that stuff, since my memory isn't that great. If you wanted to find out about that stuff, you can go here instead. I'm sure Roch would cover that part better than I would, to say the least.

In any case, I had a ton of fun hosting the event, and considering how my co-host was an absolute dream to work with, we really managed to pull off quite a coup. For two days straight, the audience was hot and firmly behind every single band, cosplayer, and performer onstage, which, admittedly, is one of the most difficult things to do in an event where people only generally care about the cosplay segment and nothing more.

On day 1, the muse of the Best of Anime, Sam, was featured, and that was pretty interesting. Some of the highlights that day included Dennis Isidoro rocking like mad to the tune of "Jiban", and the Gibson sisters dominating three of the non-cosplay contests.

During the cosplay proper, I was wholeheartedly rooting for the girl who cosplayed as the Panzer from Zoids. The detail and the movement she put into the whole bit really wowed me. Of course, Umali came in his War Machine costume, complete with pulsating guns and cannons, which I quipped made for a lucky girlfriend for War Machine. The audience agreed.

Sagashimono disproved the notion that nobody cares what happens in a con after the cosplay, because their fans were positively rabid! I was overjoyed for Sagashimono as they just ruled the stage on Day 1.

Towards the end of the event, I had my first attempt at planking onstage, which I was totally doing ironically. One of my friends dared me, so I just went ahead and pulled it off. I'm still not a fan of planking, and I'm not going to start doing it at every gig I perform at. Besides, it's gonna be illegal soon. Welcome to the Philippines.

Special mention as well to MC, the girl we had on Day 2, who announced to everyone what a Gashapon was. She was our official Gashapon endorser for the whole day, and the last auction we had on Day 2, which led to people bidding like crazy for an overcoat, really caused quite a stir. The bidding war that sent the overcoat to 2,000 bucks was simply a sight to behold.

But really, day 2, to me, was marked by an amusing turn of events, where three attempts were made to get me to the Ani-Marriage Booth.

The first time, I managed to evade capture until the priest cuffed my co-host, Marybeth, instead.

The second time was hilarious, because initially, one of the security people was shooing the priest away. Then, he changed his mind, held me in place, and they did manage to cuff me to my co-host. Of course, what most people forget is that I'm serious when I say I'm an escapologist. I asked for a hairpin from Marybeth, then proceeded to lockpick my way out of the cuffs within a minute. We even went onstage just to taunt the Marriage Booth guys about it.

The third time, there was no escape...


You can just see how vehemently I was protesting this.

So I managed to end up cuffed to one of my best friends, Jazminne. It was hilarious even if she did try to hammerlock me a couple of times. We both had fun, though, and it was a pretty enjoyable as far as non-binding marriages go.


With this ring, you will become myyyy preciousssss...

Shortly afterwards, our "marriage certificate" was drawn up, the handcuffs were released, and I casually pointed out that I still had a hairpin in my pocket. I guess it just slipped my mind to lockpick my way out of getting "married" to Jazminne. LOL.


They didn't even spell her name right, making it doubly non-binding.

At the end of the two days, I felt exceptionally happy, having hosted non-stop for the duration of the event, and having made some great new friends, as well as touching base with some old ones as well. It was a great time for me, and as early as now, they want me and Marybeth to host for them in 2012. Well, why not?

In any case, thanks to Primetrade Asia for the opportunity to host this event. I was truly honored. More thanks to Chanty, who was with me for an after-party for two after the event as we had dinner to mark the successful occasion.


All in a day's work.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Fabucelles Returns!

.:Fabucelles Is Back!!!:.

The POC has Fabucelles writing a scathing new one for them, covering the whole Jerzon Senador hoopla, essentially pointing out how for more than just a few people, they're so gung-ho about animal rights, yet they're so quick to ignore gay rights while they go into a sanctimonious, self-aggrandizing speech to lambast Jerzon Senador for his obvious travesty, while subjecting him to homophobic speech when gay people had nothing to do with this whole mess anyways...

This frustrates me greatly, because it was unnecessary and uncalled for. I'd be the last person to make excuses for Jerzon's actions, but why are we using "gay" as an insult against him? No, it's not okay. It isn't okay at all to make a sick joke of someone's being, and turn it into a tired punchline. Condemn his actions all you want, but dammit, lay off the homophobia and assorted hate speech.

I'm just dismayed this keeps on happening,to be honest. Every single time, when someone does something wrong, it's so easy for us to just dogpile on the poor guy to the point where the punishment no longer even fits the crime, and we become every bit as inhuman as the person we loathe, completely defeating the purpose of rebuking him for his lack of moral fiber by having none to show for ourselves.

And the ultimate irony of ironies? Few people even realize this when they do it. When we lambasted Boyet Fajardo for power-tripping over someone who did something wrong to him, did we stop to think why what he did was wrong? Remember this?



Well, we are turning into a nation of Boyet Fajardo's. It's so hard for us to show compassion or even restraint in the face of an apology, and in our so-called righteous fury, we hurt people who had nothing to do with the problem along the way. Really? A few days past Rizal's 150th birth anniversary, this is how we show what it means to be a Filipino? To put on an internet tough guy attitude, and then to resort to homophobic slurs to insult someone whose grievous mistake had nothing to do with his sexuality?

How enlightened of all of us! How easy it is to throw stones, without even aiming squarely for our target, and even getting angry when other people who had nothing to do with this issue feel gravely offended! How many of you got annoyed when gays started complaining about being targeted by your hate speech for no apparent reason? How dare these people, with, you know, human rights, get in the way of our armchair crusade for animal rights?!?

Listen. If you wanna be a slacktivist and throw stones on the internet against an animal abuser, make sure you're throwing stones against the animal abuser, and not against the entire LGBT community. They had nothing to do with this, so the least you could do is to leave them the fuck alone.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Turning Tricks : Philippine Magic Turmoil

.:Turning Tricks:.

Nation, yours truly realizes that he is far from a commentarist on the showbiz industry, and that’s well and good. After all, for the most part, the world of show business is full of backstabbing, ungrateful, rumor-mongering hypocrites, so much unlike the world of politics.

Nonetheless, a few people know that I have some expertise when it comes to the worlds of magic and mentalism, which, thanks to a couple of recent developments on television, are now a hot-button topic in the world of show business, if not for a minority of people who actually keep an eye on developments among mentalists and magicians in mainstream media.

Now, some people might ask why we lump magicians, who are known for doing tricks, with mentalists, who are known for demonstrating skills. Aren’t they supposed to be different? Well, yes, and no. While the methodologies may (or may not) be different, the outcome is the same: something seemingly impossible is made possible. Either way, both magicians and mentalists are entertainers. It becomes pretty embarrassing when they try to be anything else. These performers are here to entertain, not to start a new religion. Yet a few people seem to lose sight of that.

If one may make such an analogy, magic and mentalism work just like pro wrestling. Yes, there will be deception involved on both ends. No, we, as performers, will not go out of our way in the middle of performances to expose the business for your own pleasure. It’s all about entertainment, so why be apologetic for a deception that is inherently understood as part of the equation in the first place? What point will it serve to break the vissimilitude of an excellent performance? Surely, it would take an exceptional kind of person to willingly break this golden rule, right?

In a recent episode on TV 5’s Magic Gimik,Bearwin Meily earned the ire of virtually the entire magic community because he went out and actually exposed some secrets behind the art form. It didn’t take long for the community that used to glorify him to now declare him “persona non grata.” Now, if you ever had to earn a living and the preservation of a harmless secret is what spelled the difference between your ability or lack thereof to feed your family, how do you think it would make you feel to have your meal ticket disappear while Mr.Meily mugs it up for the camera? Surely, you can’t help but feel grateful to him, right? “Thanks! You just killed my livelihood, but you’re my idol! Yeah!”


Being a still cap of the episode, I wasn’t so sure if he was blowing or sucking. The smoke, I mean.

How about the new TV show called “Mind Master” featuring the mentalist known as Nomer Lasala? When he tells you a totally believable story about being banned from a casino at a younger age because he can “read the dealer’s mind and predict what the numbers could be,” don’t you just feel the truthiness of his world? After all, when you were younger, weren’t you banned from casinos too, albeit for a slightly different reason, like you know, being underaged? Surely Mr. Lasala must be telling the truth! Mentalists out there must be nodding their heads in approval because this story is in no way unbelievable whatsoever.


This is the face of a man you could totally trust.

In the magic and mentalism world, they may be misunderstood, but truly, people like Mr.Meily and Mr.Lasala are true heroes of the art form, and they must be respected as such. On the one hand, we have Bearwin, who gives away secrets to magic he doesn’t own because he wants other magicians to step up, since clearly, he believes that magicians need to step up and get more talented because he is already himself absolutely oozing with skill and talent in the art of prestidigitation. Surely, Jeffrey Tam, with his cabinet full of trophies from winning international magic competitions can’t hold a candle to the accolades of Bearwin Meily who has won... absolutely nothing. What a man, indeed, to incite everyone to step up. What a tough act to follow!

On the other hand, we have Nomer, who is the paragon of honesty and sincerity. How could you not believe him when he tells you that he can’t do a telekinesis(sic) anymore while bending a piece of metal for your amusement? Truly, if honesty is such a lonely word, then its sole companion is Nomer Lasala himself. Isn’t it comfortable for Filipino mentalists out there to know that a man like this is going to capably represent them? Surely, because it was published online, that means the journalists who wrote this have done their fact-checking, right? Surely, they’ve checked if Mr. Lasala has ever been to Switzerland, or asked casinos whether or not they’ve banned him, or at least know his name, right? Why would Mr. Lasala, heaven forbid, ever embellish a story just to make himself a bigger deal than he actually is? That’s just unheard of! It must also do the heart good to trust in his predictions like the time he promised this lady that her estranged husband would come back to her within six months – oh, wait, he didn’t. Emotional and psychological trauma for the sake of entertainment! Willie Revillame would be proud. Hope that guy you talked to really wins the next elections, then, or else you’d have led them on with false hopes, huh?

Nation, Philippine magic is a very fickle industry, rife with many flash-in-the-pan acts who will tickle your fancy for maybe a few months then fade away into obscurity until they immortalize themselves by doing something absolutely heroic like stabbing their so-called friends in the back by exposing their secrets wholesale, or stabbing their so-called friends in the back by betraying the very people who gave them a break and then lying through their teeth about it. These people of great strength of character are the exemplars by which future magicians should live by.

Welcome to our crazy world. It’s shrouded in secrecy, it has its share of lunatics, but then, when all of this is for your entertainment, and when it doesn’t really hurt anybody, where’s the harm in letting kayfabe run its course onstage? Surely, unless you are a true-blue exemplar who finds himself exempt from petty things like concepts of propriety and respect for other people’s livelihoods, then one should be willing to share a knowing wink with the performer that hey, let’s just all have fun and not stress over the details too much. A lot of performers seem to be forgetting that we’re here to entertain, not to start a new religion. Trying to pass off your psychological mind games and your sleight of hand as genuine psychic power is just tacky and sets performing arts back by making it a joke when the truth comes out.

Of course, if you choose otherwise, you would turn yourself into a hero. Like Bearwin. Like Nomer. If you wish to be a hero like these two, then by all means, destroy away. Go ahead and give the middle finger to all the people who came before you and worked hard to bring the industry where it is today.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

So... When Do I Get To Blog From Jail?

.:The Patriotic Filipino Strikes Again!:.

Pretty proud of my new Bio blurb on The POC, considering how much time and effort I put into constructing those five brief sentences.

Anyways, here they are...

Marcelle Fabie (Pronounced "Fa-bee-yay".), who blogs on www.mistervader.com, is a man who embodies the two greatest characteristics of a Patriotic Filipino: he is patriotic, and he is Filipino. As an upstanding individual of strong moral fibre (i.e., he doesn't get laid), he puts the "grit" in "journalistic inteGRITy." Hard-hitting, fearless (except when it comes to Rick Astley), and unbelievably opinionated, he stands for truthiness, justice, and the Filipino way. He has a Pulitzer, a Nobel, an Oscar, a Grammy, and five other weirdly-named pet dogs.

He is also a notorious satirist.


And of course, this comes with a new article that I hope you'd check out.

.:I Wish More Rants Were Less Hate-Filled And More About Epic Winning, Like Charlie Sheen. Too Bad, This Isn't One Of Those...:.

Warning: profane language, possibly triggering language regarding child abuse being treated like a non-issue as well.





Normally, I like me some rational discourse, but today, I am angry. Seething, even. If you wanted someone who will take you by the hand and care about your itty-bitty feelings, go read Marocharim. I am not going to coddle idiots in this post. I will simply be the egalitarian I normally am and hate everything. This is not your regular well-reasoned, polite post.

And you know why not? Because saying it politely before has already fallen on deaf ears. I cannot be bothered to educate people who are shocked that I find child abuse offensive and are not only being Willie Revillame apologists, but child abuse apologists as well at this point. Gasp! Child abuse is bad? Who would have thought?!?

But then, how could I be surprised? We live in a society where rape seems to be half as much the fault of the victim as it is the perpetrator (How often do we ask what a murder victim was wearing?). We live in a society where people go "focus on the real issues instead," as if child abuse isn't an issue. We live in a society where people think that if everyone is having fun, then abuse didn't exist. We live in a society where people think that lousy parents giving their consent to their child performing like a macho dancer on national television makes a child performing like a macho dancer on national television okay. We live in a society where we're willing to look the other way for one man's sins just because he donates money to charity.

Well, screw you, because I don't care about your stupid rhetoric or your attempts to derail from the issue. The issue is pretty clear: Willie Revillame has been a smug, self-important douchebag for a long time already. It didn't matter if 71 people were killed for the sake of his brand of "saya at pag-asa," so long as he kept on bringing it. With each victory he scored, he grew bolder and bolder, to the point where he now believes that he is above petty things like the law and notions of decency and appropriateness.

And it's gotten pretty sad when a guy like me, who is far from a moral guardian, already feels compelled to call out someone and say, "duuuuude. That's not cool. At all." The line between acceptable and unacceptable can sometimes be so fine, but even though Willie Revillame and his ilk pushing their luck all these years has allowed for that line to be blurrier and blurrier, it should become pretty obvious when someone has outright crossed it.

Last Friday, in a 25-minute tirade that showed Willie Revillame was every bit as capable of judging the people whom he insists are judging him, all the while employing Ad Hominem attacks, Ad Misericordiam, red herrings, appealing to fear, appealing to some mysterious showbiz fraternity rule, appealing to a class divide, veiled homophobia, splitting hairs between child labor and child work, attacking a woman for being childless, asking at least two National Artist shoo-ins what they have done for this country (LOL, seriously?!?), persecution complex, using "entertainment" as a justification for his puerile means, lawsuit threats on everyone on Twitter who bashed him, assorted silencing tactics in aid of muddying the issue even further, and in the case of accusing ABS CBN and even PNoy himself, plain conspiracy theory nutjobbery.

Did I miss anything else? I wouldn't be surprised, to be honest, but that's a pretty extensive list of logical fallacies and silencing tactics I have observed Willie Revillame using for years upon years while his fans yay and cheer behind him and then boo and hiss those against him. If you wanted a good primer on logical fallacies and their non-bearing on arguments, feel free to read this post.

Apparently, in the minds of Willie Revillame's apologists, their hero can do no wrong. Oh, let's forget that nobody should be untouchable and beyond criticism. Let's assume that anyone who dares dislike their lord and savior Willie Revillame is merely jealous of him.

Jealous?!? Of what?!? Why would I be jealous of having the opportunity to alleviate poverty through the power and influence I yield all over this nation and fucking it up that same opportunity every single day I fall back to giving dole-outs instead? Why would I be jealous of being regarded as lecherous and being worshiped for the lie I have perpetuated about myself? Why would we be jealous of committing child abuse on national fucking television?!?

And don't you dare tell me to calm the fuck down or to lighten the fuck up! I know all too well how child abuse feels like, because I lived through it, first-hand! Try being force-fed your Magic: The Gathering cards or being sucker-punched in the gut or being sent to places you have no idea how you're going to get home from.

Hell, let's not even talk about physical abuse. Try being constantly berated for years that you're the black sheep of the family while you're consistently on top of class all because you're smarter than your pathetic excuse for a stepdad. Try being the subject of endless potshots at the dinner table when all you wanted was to enjoy a quite "family meal." Try having the Bible used and misused to cow you into thinking that all of this is just fine and dandy, and then being forcefully told to shut up because he's the authority in the "family" when you use the same Bible to disprove his backwards ideas.

If I could give up only one of these types of abuse, I'd have gladly taken twice as much physical abuse over the undeniable demolition job that jackass put on my sense of self-worth over years upon years of verbal and psychological abuse.

These are real issues to me because I lived through them, and I can only hope that no matter how snarky or smarmy I can get, if I were to have a kid, I would never subject them to any form of abuse, and make sure to prepare them for the eventual attempts at abuse that will come from without. I will make damned sure that when my child is home, that home is a safe place.

So go ahead, I dare you, you douchebag: sue me. Sue me for taking you to task for something I have personally gone through: a miserable nightmare for years that you just flippantly dismissed as a non-issue. Go ahead! Sue me! And tell me to lighten up, too! Tell me that my years of experience in an abusive household is nothing and I should just "get over it" and fucking move on. Tell me that there are "bigger issues" than child abuse, I dare you!

I know this comes as a surprise to you, dear Willie Revillame and dear Willie apologists, but not everyone complaining about Willing Willie do so dahil inggit lang sila kay Willie. Some people are angry because they actually have valid reasons to be angry about having an asshole make light of something that is by no means a trivial matter.

So really, Willie, good riddance. Go ahead and take your two-week vacation, then please do all of us a favor and decide to make it permanent. I don't need you coming back to tell me some more how I'm too uptight about a situation I went through myself and having you trigger me all over again.

Oh. Was I being inconsiderate about your feelings on being called out for being a child abuse apologist? Did I hurt your feelings because of how I said my piece just now? Good. Because you sure as Hades were being inconsiderate about my feelings when you made light of child abuse. Don't expect me to extend the same courtesy you couldn't be bothered to extend in the first place.

So if telling you that I don't find child abuse funny makes you want to sue me and send me to jail where I can finally ask Ms. Lea Salonga for an autograph, then lock me right up and throw away the key. I just wanna know if the jail cell has wifi.

Monday, April 04, 2011

Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 6 Of 6): A Special Bonus Feature On The Entitlement Complex

.:Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 6 Of 6)Bonus Feature: The Entitlement Complex:.


Because I totally have every right to demand her to go to all those conventions so I can stalk her whenever I feel like it, goddammit!!!

Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 5 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Ignorantium and Slippery Slope Logic

.:Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 5 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Ignorantium and Slippery Slope Logic:.


The idiocy! It’s over 9000!!!

Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 4 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Populum

.:Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 4 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Populum:.


So just because everyone is doing it, this makes it right?

Friday, April 01, 2011

Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 1 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Hominem

.:Logical Fallacies 101 (Part 1 Of 6): Argumentum Ad Hominem:.

Hello there! Given that it was April Fool’s Day a couple of days ago and there are a lot of fools out there running around, I feel that it is my civic duty to help enlighten some people so that they wouldn’t spout off and look like a complete idiot while at it.

You may not realize it, but often, in the fine art of argumentation, people are prone to logical fallacies. Now, what are logical fallacies? Logical fallacies are, at their most basic, errors in reasoning. When a person tries to argue and sway you to side with their opinion, that person is capable of arguing fallaciously, particularly when they make an argument that has not been well thought out.

The problem is most people throw these arguments about without realizing that they don’t strengthen their position at all. Worse, some of them look downright silly, because instead of giving simple, factual arguments, they would use their anger, or perhaps their limited anecdotal experience, or just their flat-out ignorance to try to win an argument.

Don’t fall for it. Don’t let it work. Seriously.

Over the course of the next six articles are a few common logical fallacies, with matching examples. As a disclaimer, yes, these articles will also be prone to their own share of logical fallacies (More so the comments, I'm guessing.), but one hopes that the point is not lost despite that fact.

Argumentum Ad Hominem


What an eloquent rebuttal!!!

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

On Gods With Feet Of Clay, And The Filipino Dream (Or,What I REALLY Wanted To Say About Manny And Willie.)

.:Gods With Feet Of Clay:.

The past couple of weeks has been an exercise in rationalization for a culture built upon deifying celebrity and elevating them far above and beyond the standards by which we expect of mere mortals such as ourselves.

Some of the issues seem petty when you look at it, really. A famous celebrity announces that she is leaving the very thing that has made her famous in the first place, and instead of having people wish her well, some of her fans actually feel betrayed, as if suddenly, what she wishes to do with her life no longer takes precedence over what her fans want her to do.

Couple that with the fact that she probably isn’t even leaving but probably setting up for something else, and you can see how the overreactions from certain people, practically calling her a traitor to a cause that doesn’t even seem to be a particularly earth-shattering cause to give up your hopes and dreams over in the first place, becomes rather silly. Maybe even pathetic.

The power of celebrity exists. There is no point in denying that. But just as we cannot allow them to be anything more than human by virtue of their celebrity, neither should they be anything less than human by virtue of their celebrity. They have their own lives to lead, their own choices to make, and if we truly support them or believe in them, we must realize that we have no right to demand from our celebrity to abandon their own wishes just to cater to our every whim.

And one guesses that’s exactly what is at work here: a very disheartening gap between the idol and the worshippers, a chasm that is ever-widened by how much slack we are willing to cut our personal heroes so long as they continue to entertain us and cater to our every whim. And how that gap is made even more insurmountable when the inevitable betrayal happens, our vicarious hopes and dreams shattered in the failure of our erstwhile beloved god, turning the altar we once worshipped upon into the pillar we wish to scourge them upon in the blink of an eye.

And yet, through it all, they will move on and not really give a damn about what we think, say, do, or feel. When we realize that we have lived through someone for so long that we’ve forgotten to live our own lives, what happens? What do we do with ourselves, then?

The Fists Of Fury

As I wrote in my article on Manny Pacquiao, there is no question that he is one of the greatest boxers of all time. He is, without a doubt, the best one of this decade, and he has been more than well-rewarded financially and socially on the back of his fifty-two hard-earned victories inside the boxing ring. Nobody can take that away from him.

Sports heroes tend to get a pass in a lot of things. It’s rather easy to see, and it was quite fortuitous I was reading Michael Leahy’s book while I was thinking about this. It put a lot of things into perspective for me and allowed me to step back and look at the bigger picture. In the sporting world, it doesn’t matter if you philander, gamble compulsively, get into fights, or heaven forbid, rape someone. So long as you persist in your winning ways, all is forgiven.

Is this right? Of course not. But you see, it’s understandable: what does a basketball fan care about what his idol does in his bedroom? That’s not a part of the game, and that’s irrelevant to how many points he can score in a game, or how many assists he can dish out.

What people are forgetting is that nobody was critiquing Manny Pacquiao, the boxer. They were critiquing Congressman Manny Pacquiao, the guy who was not doing his job when he really should have, by not properly casting his vote for or against the impeachment of the Ombudsman.

Being a boxing legend does not excuse him from being a lousy congressman. The ever-predictable Paclanders are too busy blaming @momblogger not only for the embarrassment caused by Pacquiao leaving Twitterlandia, but even for his choice of words. And then they had the nerve to say that he meant it in jest, so lighten up.

Lighten up? Really? Lighten up?!?

Weren’t you the same people who refused to lighten up when Alec Baldwin made an off-hand joke about Filipina mail-order brides? Weren’t you the same people who refused to lighten up when Teri Hatcher made a joke in a comedy show about Filipino med schools? Weren’t you the same people who refused to lighten up when Chip Tsao made a satirical article that was making deliberately inflammatory statements to expose the bullying tactics of mainland China? And now you’re telling people to lighten up? Really?

Look: you can’t dictate how other people should feel. If they took offense, they have every right to take offense. And as a Congressman and as someone who has been trying so hard to maintain a certain modicum of role-modelness, Manny should have known better than to make a flippant statement like that. You don’t get to dictate what should be or shouldn’t be offensive to people and then dismiss them by virtue of your own thick-skinnedness because you’d take any insult from your lord and savior Pacquiao as a validation rather than a slight.

Manny Pacquiao’s recent misadventures were not the fault of the people who called him out on Twitter. It was the fault of a man who chose to run for public office when clearly, he had more pressing priorities than the welfare of his own district.

There’s nothing wrong with being a boxing legend, but there’s something wrong with shirking on one’s responsibility and then expecting everyone to just understand. No, not everyone understands, nor are they required to. Unlike you, Mr. Pacquiao, we can’t just take a month or two off work if we feel like beating a Mexican up for $20M. Your deficiencies as a congressman are not beyond question, because how well you punch has nothing to do with how well you lead your constituency.

So to those Paclanders who can’t get this into their heads: all the people on Twitter ever did was to tell a man to do his job. The one he ran for public office for. I think it’s ridiculous that anyone could possibly obfuscate the issue just because he’s a boxing legend. If he didn’t want to do his job, he shouldn’t have applied for the job in the 2010 elections to begin with. The tone argument is beside the point, and does not erase the fact that Honorable Pacquiao is still not doing his job.

How many of us here can fully expect to be praised for not doing your job? I sure can’t.

Willieng Pawns

It was an issue I felt strongly about, albeit I recognized I was relatively powerless in comparison to the originator of the news to me, Aileen Apolo, or the one whom I passed the news onto, MomBlogger. When I saw Jan-Jan’s video, I was shocked at how callous everyone around him was. The kid was crying. He was frightened. And yet, despite all of that, Willie Revillame did not show any signs of easing up on the kid, and still made him do his schtick, which proved extremely disturbing, as the kid gyrated like “a macho dancer,” as Willie Revillame himself put it.

I have despised Willie’s shows for years already, although he isn’t the only one whose tacky and trashy programming I’ve despised. It’s ironic how much more heart a Jerry Springer ripoff like Amy Perez’s Face To Face has, compared to a show like Willing Willie, that’s supposed to be giving joy and hope to the Filipino masses. Fabucelles shares my sentiments, to say the least.

We’ve heard that line a million times before: nagpapasaya lang kami at nagbibigay ng pag-asa. But at what cost does this joy and hope come?

Ridiculously long snaking lines for hopefuls who wish to get into the TV studio for a remote shot at riches, some of them doing this routine for weeks: weeks that could have instead been spent actually looking for a productive job instead of hoping to get a crack at that money tree Willie has been bandying about?

People of all ages selling their dignity for a few thousand bucks, then once the well has run dry, they’d run right back in line to do it all over again?

A fatal stampede, resulting in the deaths of 78 people. So much for “saya at pag-asa” for 78 lives snuffed out due to poor planning and terrible logistics?

Are all of these sins placed solely upon the head of one Willie Revillame? Of course not. But he is the man fronting the show that has showcased this kind of exploitative behaviour more than any other show, not only as its main host, but as one of its top producers. He is a control freak who would lash out at a cameraman who is so much as out of place, as a perfectionist and a consummate workaholic. Nobody can take that away from the man.

In fact, let’s give credit where credit is due: he has probably given out more money through his sponsors than any three to five different local charitable institutions you can pick at random, combined, almost all of this money going to the poor, the downtrodden, and ultimately, the desperate.

Unfortunately, it’s precisely that desperation that has allowed Willie’s blinded fans to give him a pass on anything he has ever done. With each victory he scores atop his unimpeachable soapbox, Willie’s confidence has turned into outright smugness, knowing full well that he has more clout than anyone willing to call him out on the mockery he has made of the Filipino masses.

The ends do not justify the means. Otherwise, it would be okay to lie, cheat, and steal just to get money. Entertainment is never an excuse for crass behaviour and lewd sensationalism. Giving hope and helping others is never going to wash away the blood of the 78 lives snuffed all in the name of this hope and help. If you made your officemates laugh in the pantry all the time, will that save you from getting fired if you embezzled the company’s money? Can your good intentions undo the hurt you have caused with your thoughtless actions?

And yet again, people tell us to “lighten up, it’s just a TV show!” Really? Really?!? Just a TV show that has resulted in the deaths of 78 people (Let’s not play coy here: Willing Willie = Wowowee.)? Just a TV show that has made it seem like exploitation and child abuse are just normal things we should come to expect from Philippine television? Just a TV show where people sell their souls for a few thousand pesos, yet not really elevating their lives afterwards? Really? That’s it?!?

No, you douchebags! It’s not just a TV show. It’s a mirror of the kind of society we live in that is not only on the verge of tolerating the abuse of a child on national television, but even making it his fault that he got treated like that, because that’s what he wanted to do when he auditioned! Woooow!

Allow me to educate you for a moment here. When Willie said that it was Jan-Jan’s idea to dance like a macho dancer, Willie has resorted to Victim Blaming, a phenomenon where instead of placing the blame squarely on the offender, we instead point to the victim. If, for example, a woman gets raped, it’s not the rapist’s fault: it’s the woman’s fault, because she dresses too “sluttily”, or she led the rapist on. What kind of backwards thinking is that?!?

Jan-Jan is six years old. The people screening him were far older than that, and Willie’s what? Forty-something? These are people who should have known better. Instead, after seeing Jan-Jan dance the way he did, Willie asked him to do it again, and again, and again! Where’s the concern there? Or is this because it causes so much “joy” and “hope” to see a desperate kid dance like a macho dancer for a few thousand bucks? Ang saya-saya ko naman makita yan! I’m sorry, but I can’t get off of Schadenfreude from a six-year old kid.

And the parents? They’re okay with it? So Jan-Jan has lousy parents, who tolerate having a kid who can dance like a macho dancer for the entertainment of people. Does that suddenly just absolve Willie Revillame? Really? It does? Or is that less an absolution of Willie Revillame, but also an indictment of Jan-Jan’s parents, putting them in the same police line-up as Willie and the vultures backing this mockery of a show?

In all honesty, it’s sad that instead of a call for unity, we’ve had people saying those among us indignant now are hypocrites. Let’s ignore the fact that only now is social media finding the clout to get things done, compared to even just a year or two ago, when it was just next to ignored. Let’s ignore how many celebrities are now on Twitter, whereas they were nowhere to be found online just last year. Let’s ignore that this is a catalyst for action, and not just a knee-jerk reaction of hypocrisy. Let’s even ignore that there is a huge gap between fully consenting adults dancing sexily for a living and a six-year old dancing sexily for a one-time windfall.

Common sense has flown out the window. Iya Justimbaste is probably laughing now, pointing at the folly of the Filipinos who make up excuses for the imperfections of their gods like Pacquiao and Revillame.

Newsflash: they were never perfect. The sooner you accept it, the sooner you will realize that they should be held accountable for their shortcomings when it does worse than just affect themselves.

Our gods have feet of clay. It shouldn’t have been a surprise at all, and it shouldn’t be our fault that we are just pointing out the truth. The truth hurts. The sooner you can accept it, the sooner we can do something about it.

This was never about rich versus poor. Don’t let the Pacquiao’s, the Estrada’s, or the Revillame’s of the world fool you. These people are far richer than any of us so-called rich people, to begin with. It has always been a question of the willingness of the Filipino person to do the right thing and correct the wrong thing, no matter how inconvenient it might be.

Throw away everything and boil down to the essentials, and then ask yourself with all honesty: is it truly impossible to help people without resorting to sexy dancers, exploiting sob stories, and fatal stampedes? And if our answer is “no, it’s not impossible,” then why the Hades are we tolerating the status quo?

Think about it.

Wednesday, December 08, 2010

A Whole Lotto Fun

A Whole Lotto Fun
By Marcelle Fabie

Nation, there is truly nothing greater than feeling joy and happiness for the good fortune of another person. It feels as if there is a kind of bond that we manage to share with those who are so blessed: a sharing of joy and happiness that cannot but lift our spirits as we vicariously bask in the glory of those whom we congratulate and wish nothing but the best for.

We are a country that shares in the victories of our heroes, whether in the realm of sports like Manny Pacquiao and Efren Bata Reyes; or in the realm of music, like Lea Salonga and Charice Pempengco. We recognize that the victory of one of our countrymen is the victory of the nation as a whole. And even if it were a foreigner who has found themselves in the company of the Filipino people, such as Korean superstar Sandara Park or former beauty queen Dayanara Torres, the Filipino people also shares in their triumphs.

That being said, I hope whoever won the 740M pot in the last lottery draw disappears from the face of the earth for all eternity, the rotten bastich.

Was it not the eminent Archbishop Cruz who condemned this anonymous winner for all eternity by letting him know that he or she stole this money from the Filipino people? Clearly, a person who bought a ticket for twenty pesos stole 740 million pesos from all of us, no matter how illogical that sounds. After all, how dare somebody win a lottery, right? These things were supposed to be a tax on people who are bad with math, yet somehow, someone broke those odds. And for that, we have to begrudge them.

And nation, everything’s better with Tim Yap, considering how famous he made Miko Morelos by tweeting that the man actually won the lottery. Let’s not let the fact that he was merely reporting about someone winning the lottery nor the fact that for the sake of protecting a person, the names of lottery winners are withheld get in the way of Tim Yap’s insatiable desire to get a scoop despite being about as credible a journalist as 1:43 would if they came up with a documentary about quality music.

With a lynch mob out for the scalp of Miko Morelos for his (non-existent) good fortune, is it any wonder that we patriotic Filipinos cannot feel anything but utter pride in how classy we have become as a nation in the face of good fortune and triumph? After all, we merely want to spare this poor, anonymous (Possibly Korean) lottery winner from a lifetime of misery that would beset them if they took that prize money.

Statistics have been clear about how many big lottery winners have ended up being worse off financially after everything because of paranoia, exorbitant spending, and fair-weathered friends (and even wives) all teaming up to do a number on a winner who, in the end, feels more like a loser after everything. We don’t want that fate upon them, and in wishing they would share the burden of 740 million sinful Pesos with the rest of us, perhaps we could mitigate such a Herculean task.

And really, we patriotic Filipinos have nothing but the best of intentions at heart for our anonymous winner. With the destruction upon one’s life that 740 million pesos can wreak, one can only hope that they would not allow this misery to befall our unknown friend.

In the end, no matter how much money one may win, all the money in the world can never buy them class. The kind of class we patriotic Filipinos already have in buckets.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

P-Pop? More Like P-Poop, Amirite?

.:P-Pop? More Like P-Poop, Amirite?:.

Reading Ade's, Rico's, and Jepoy's scathing commentary, I couldn't help but take a closer look at all the hubbub.



Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to a new age in Philippine pop music (I dare not call it Original Pinoy music...): P-Pop, following in the tradition of K-Pop and J-Pop, is becoming quite a trend, and while the few acts composing the P-Pop scene are still sparse and not quite yet there in terms of overwhelming popularity, it’s still a trend to take note of, nonetheless.

I’m sure it’s easy to just handwave all of this and say that it’s just business as usual of Filipinos ripping off “foreign” and “superior” products, but you see, it’s always possible to adapt something well, and clearly, that’s not what they’ve managed to achieve here so far.

The thing I noticed with K-Pop is that while there are some distinct qualities present in all their popular acts, the whole concept is still very broad and very varied, and it seems that our take on P-Pop is limited by the equally limited viewpoint we have of K-Pop. It’s like we took a snapshot of one particular facet of the genre, then spun ourself off of only that snapshot of the tapestry.

I suppose this is the pot calling the kettle black, because I’d admit I use the same tactic when I try to channel my inner Colbert and Tsao when I write for The POC and now, Filipino Voices, but it’s best to be self-aware when you do these send-ups rather than act as if you’re suddenly a magical authority on the genre just because you’re aping it.

As a guy who has a wide range of taste in music, I can’t say I absolutely detest XLR8, although their new competitor, 1:43, what with their deliberately mangled Taglish, gives the term “indie music” a whole new meaning. In the words of the great Mike Unson, “indie yan music.” But I digress, because I recognize it’s a matter of taste. And I’m glad I have enough of it to just stick to less pretentious genres within the world of OPM.

For the life of me, I’d never understand how the local music industry works and survives the way it does. It seems to thrive off of remakes, novelty acts, Willie Revillame, and bandwagons, and yet at the same time, genuine genius in the likes of Eraserheads, Itchyworms, Juan dela Cruz, Gary Valenciano, Francis Magalona, Gloc 9 all still have a place in the industry. It’s easy to dismiss bubblegum pop as fluff that nobody will remember in five years’ time, but it’s here to stay, so I guess I’d just count my blessings whenever I see some of those acts slip through the cracks. Maybe as P-Pop gets more refined, we’d finally have a distinctive pop sound all our own, but for now, it’s just really badly mangled Taglish, and I can’t be bothered to support this kind of music.

And, oh, just because their frontman is still doing that stupid exposure show, can I just register my disdain for Callalily’s music? Yes, I’m biased. No, I don’t care.

Overall, watching this music video really made me facepalm. I think I’ve worked in the radio industry long enough to know that this doesn’t even remotely qualify as good music...



You hear that sound? That’s the sound of my soul dying juuuuust a little. It’s as if I looked at the face of the Other and tried to extend my kind gaze to her in a way that would make Levinas proud, then the Other promptly got up, smiled back at me, then swiftly kicked me in the ‘nads. It was just aggravating to listen to the song, and as much as I want to restrain myself from being overtly opinionated and blasting something I dislike without trying to be fair about it, this one made me want to tell this hidden “gem” of an act to please, please, stay hidden.

Lately, it feels like anyone who has a CD Burner, a Mac, and Autotune could come out with the latest and hottest “indie wonder” album. Somewhere out there, the Einerlei bares its ever-expanding maw, to consume one and all as we find ourselves deeply entrenched in a morass of mediocrity and bandwagoning.

Way to go, 1:43! You have set the bar lower for succeeding acts, and everyone else is going to look like effing Tchaikovsky right next to you! Thank you for rendering this great service to the music world.

Recently, Korean actress Lee Da Hae made apparently disparaging comments about how Filipinos speak English, and there was a mild furor over the whole issue. Once again, another celebrity has joined the Alec Baldwin's, the Chip Tsao's, and the Adam Carolla's of the world. She has subsequently apologized, but as per schedule, more than a few Filipinos still demand some retribution, some payback, if you will.

Filipinos looking for vengeance, look no further. 1:43 is the musical equivalent of flipping the bird at the Korean people.

Less vindictive Filipinos, on the other hand, would like to apologize to the Korean people for this travesty. Then again, we don't really know if we could forgive ourselves for this, to begin with.

On first look, 1:43 may seem like a bad ripoff of K-Pop minus all the talent. But don't be fooled, 1:43 is a bad ripoff of K-Pop minus all the talent.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Alec Baldwin Apologizes. The Other Guy: Still A D-Bag

.:He Apologized Already. Let’s Move On, Mmkay?:.

Alec Baldwin apologizes, and proves he’s a bigger class act than certain people we know...

Alec Baldwin is not a perfect person. His life isn’t even measured in years, but in public apologies. Despite all that, he’s still a much classier person than Senator Revilla, who threatened him with bodily harm. Never mind that the also-“insulted” Russians didn’t even bother reacting to the issue. Never mind that nobody seems to care that Krusty the Clown also insulted the Philippines, and Roger Ebert slammed a Filipino movie during Cannes. Of course, I’d be doubly amused and annoyed if they picked up on those issues and used it to grandstand some more.

But really now. The passive-aggressive apology was just classic Baldwin. He said what I hoped Chip Tsao would’ve said: that it was merely said in jest (Or in Tsao’s case, in the course of a satire.), and that while he meant no offense, he apologizes to those who took offense. It’s a clean admission of (non) guilt, and does not condone the hate messages that flew in response to what was merely perceived as a racist remark.

For the life of me, I cannot understand why a lot of Filipinos are so uptight over the lightest remark, and are willing to resort to fisticuffs just to defend their honor. Sen. Revilla and Rep. Golez seem to be made from the same mold.

If you’re a foreigner, you can’t say anything negative about the Philippines. That’s racism.

If you’re a Filipino, you can’t say anything negative about the Philippines, either. That’s crab mentality.

Ergo, nobody can say anything negative about the Philippines. Period. Absobloodylutely brilliant.

Will we ever get to see this country get its head out of its own @$$?

Who knows? The Shadow knows.