Thursday, April 29, 2004

.:Movie Reviews:.

As usual, Spoilers Ahead!!!

Starsky And Hutch
Good thing they weren't in Canada...

I was never a huge Ben Stiller or Owen Wilson fan, truth be told. If anything, I didn't really like much of their movies, except perhaps Ben Stiller's “Meet The Parents”, which, even then, wasn't anything to write home about. I haven't seen “The Royal Tenenbaums” yet, though, so I can't comment on that.

Anyways, Ben Stiller stars as Dave Starsky and Owen Wilson stars as Ken Hutchison. This is more or less a movie version of an old television series back in the 70's. The storyline is extremely routine: an overtly dedicated cop who follows the rules to the letter is paired up with a cop with an attitude. Together, they have to go against seemingly insurmountable odds and prevent what could be the largest cocaine deal in history. Been there, done that but was the treatment unique? Not as much as we would've wanted it to be, sadly.

Traditional slapstick standbys abound in the film, especially gay innuendo, with one of the villains batting for the other team actually taking a liking for Hutch. In order to gain information from him, Starsky and Hutch had to do a special... double dragon dance number, which is an image that will scar me for the rest of my life. Nonetheless, the laughs were there, as I really enjoyed how they deliberately made the pairing have gay undertones, which is commonly seen but not acknowledged in any buddy cop film to begin with...

I enjoyed this film and had quite a good laugh over it myself. While I wasn't a fan of the tired comedy, I was mostly into the sheer campiness of the film, especially when they had a dance showdown between Starsky and some other guy. The main villain, who played a Jewish crime lord, was pretty good at what he did, and the misadventures that Stiller and Wilson encountered in their attempt to expose his undetectable cocaine plot was nothing short of hilarious.

The true revelation in this film, however, is Snoop Dogg, hands down. His comedic timing was simply amazing, and who wouldn't love a black gangsta guy going by the name of “Huggy Bear”? He had a lot of good lines, and the black guy who was really smart was extremely funny during Starsky's first encounter with Huggy.

This film wasn't your best comedy film ever, but it had its appeal. Children of the 70's would get a major kick out of this (Especially with the cameo from the original Starsky and Hutch, and the Carpenters song playing in the background while Starsky was reminiscing about Hutch when they had a rift... that was so... gay.). It's nice to catch, but a repeat viewing? Nah...

Marcelle's “Fun” Evaluation: B/B+
Marcelle's “Critical” Evaluaton: C


Masikip Sa Dibdib
Masakit sa ulo panoorin.

I always had respect for Ruffa Mae Quinto's comedic prowess. Unfortunately, she's usually the hit or miss type, as for every fun movie I watch from her, I also get a clunker of a film afterwards. Booba was the spectacular comedy. This one? Calling it a “clunker” is putting it nicely.

Anyways, Ruffa Mae plays Boobita Rose, a buxom girl working in a placement office with a guy whom she happens to like, Mark, played by real-life boyfriend Rudy Hatfield. She belongs to an extremely dysfunctional family that features a certain guy named John Lapuz trying to play a womanizing (!) drug addict. If you knew John Lapuz, this was simply a surprise.

Anyways, Boobita Rose has a friend, an FX driver, played by Antonio Aquitania. This guy is really into her, and is trying to woo her, but she has eyes for only Mark. What happens next is a sequence of events that led me to simply scratch my head, as her family life crumbles, Mark is found out to have already been married, and every single member of her family is taken away by either the DSWD or rehab people in the supposed climax of the film. Chinggoy Alonso also figured into this film, and it further... dropped my regard for the man.

Apparently, Boobita Rose's entire family has an affliction wherein their noses and ears bleed whenever somebody talks to them in English. An interesting plot point, but one that was exploited so pathetically that it wasn't too funny when they pulled it off.

What was wrong with this film? First of all, the acting was too over the top. I'm used to Ruffa Mae's hamming it up, but she really upped the ante on this one, and it was annoying to death. At the same time, John Lapuz was convincing as a womanizer until his hands start moving. Then, your suspension of disbelief ends and you realize a flaming gay man is acting and trying to pass off as straight, but fail miserably. Gina Pareno was downright annoying and disturbing to watch, making out with Kier Legaspi. There wasn't any revelation in the film at all, acting-wise.

Secondly, the storyline was way too convoluted. There was no rhyme and reason to the story. Boobita Rose's family was crumbling to the ground, and she had to talk to them about it over and over and over again, to the point that it was so repetitive you'd think that they were playing a VCD that was looping. The story was that awful.

Most of all, any shots they had of coming up with a good joke was simply ruined by overkilling the joke. The first time a singer made a cameo to sing a song relevant (Well, not all the time.) to the storyline, it was actually funny. And then they did it again. And again. And again. Even Ely Buendia had a song number, for crying out loud. Jokes like these would've worked once or twice, but seven or so song numbers like this in a span of under two hours? Sheer inanity.

The ending? Oh, bah Gawd. Don't even get me started on it. Ruffa Mae finally went for Antonio Aquitania's character, only for him to reject her. Then the pilot in the plane where they meet comes out, who turns out to be Martin Nievera, and he sings “You Are My Song” Ruffa Mae then ends up making out with Martin, and they fall in love. Bull crud. Utter bull crud. Whoever wrote this stuff is about as funny as a funeral.

What else can I say? Oh, yeah. Stay away. Stay very far away from this pathetic excuse for a film.

Marcelle's “Fun” Evaluation: F
Marcelle's “Critical” Evaluation: D-

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